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01
I have finally finished chasing "Star Man Splendid", and the ending is also great.
Cheng Shaoshang and Ling Budo eliminate the contradictions and get back together, and finally become husband and wife.
looks like a happy ending, but it hides all kinds of dangers.
Cheng Shaoshang lacked the love of her parents since she was a child. She has a flaw in her heart, so what she hates most is being abandoned.
is precisely because of this, so when Ling Buxuan abandoned Cheng Shaoshang for revenge, Cheng Shaoshang could not forgive Ling Buxuan for what he did. Even if Ling Buxuan was stationed at the border for 5 years, Cheng Shaoshang was closed in Changqiu Palace. 5 years.
Five years later, the two met again. Although you have feelings and I have intentions, Cheng Shaoshang still can't forgive Ling Budo.
If Ling Budo and Cheng Shaoshang were not in danger together in the last few episodes and experienced life and death again, maybe their fate would have come to an end.
is still the same person, but everyone has grown.
Ling Budo knew how to advance and retreat with Cheng Shaoshang and fight side by side, and Cheng Shaoshang also knew tolerance and understanding.
Especially after experiencing life and death, Cheng Shaoshang understands the meaning of life better and cherishes hard-won love.
02
We forgot that Ling Budo is also a person who lacks love. He has no sense of home or security since he was a child.
Like Cheng Shaoshang, he was abandoned by his family, so their inner insecurities are the same, Ling Budo is more serious than Cheng Shaoshang.
Because of this, they have a lot of contradictions in the process of getting along.
Ling Budo is independent, so is Cheng Shaoshang. They each have their own ideas and do not want to be constrained by each other.
Ling Budo is more like a tool man than Cheng Shaoshang.
For the first 20 years of his life, he lived miserably.
saw with his own eyes his father was killed by his uncle when he was a child, which left a shadow in his heart.
But the aunt asked him to lie and asked him to avenge the Huo family.
A child who has experienced family changes and was traumatized, has never been healed.
He fought in the Quartet when he was a teenager, and he was burdened with blood and hatred, so he was an old man and lived a miserable life.
For the emperor, he is the general who fights in all directions.
For the Huo family, he is the only bloodline, and he bears a deep hatred of blood.
In short, his life is a tool.
He wants to kill the husband who betrayed her for his aunt, to avenge Ah Li who took his own life, and to hate the Huo family.
His life cannot be lived for himself, but only for the family and the country.
03It was an accident that
met Cheng Shaoshang, and it was the first time Ling Budo felt loved.
He lives in a frenzy in the world with hatred, he is the one who is driven by fate.
So he would never love someone, but the appearance of Cheng Shaoshang made him feel happy.
That was the first time I felt happy after a family accident.
But such happiness is hard to grasp.
His brain is already filled with hatred, even though he loves Cheng Shaoshang, he still chooses revenge.
Because he is a tool that has been set up with hatred, no one has taught him to forgive others and let go of himself since he was a child.
His education has always been to avenge the Huo family, which is his only goal in life.
Psychologist Brian Little has this to say:
Everyone has at least 3 selves.
One is determined by genes, the other is under the influence of environment and culture, there is another one, which is defined by the "life goals" and "values" we pursue, and the last one is the Most importantly, it is entirely your own self.
At this time, Ling Budo is still in the first two stages.
His mind is all about revenge, which is also the only life goal that supports him until he is 20 years old.
He worked hard to improve himself, just to take revenge for the Huo family on this day.
A man full of hatred, it's so hard to love someone.
And Cheng Shaoshang is a woman who lacks love, and she longs for perfection from Ling Budo.
To be happy, two unsatisfactory people need to do too much.
In the love stage of the two, Ling Budo can't be satisfied with Cheng Shaoshang, and Cheng Shaoshang can't be satisfied with Ling Budo because they have their own goals in life.
Ling Budo seeks revenge and Cheng Shaoshang seeks love. When their goals conflict, they will each choose their own path.
Then there will be a lot of contradictions and regrets.
04
Cheng Shaoshang's success was obtained from the queen.
She gained love from the queen, understood the hard work of being a parent, and learned tolerance and understanding.
It was the generosity of the queen that cured her, so she didn't waste time in Changqiu palace for 5 years, she learned a lot.
She understood that her parents had to abandon her and accepted her mother's apology. She regained the love of her family.
But Ling Budo was not so lucky.
He doesn't have a family like Cheng Shaoshang, and he doesn't have a noble person like the queen by his side. His remorse begins after revenge.
No one taught him tolerance and forgiveness, he grew upIt was the experience I gained after hitting the southern wall.
Only after he took revenge did he understand the regret and regret of losing Cheng Shaoshang.
has been in the frontier for 5 years before he understands the preciousness of a lover.
When he returned to the capital again and saw Cheng Shaoshang, he was eager to ask for peace, but he didn't know how to do it.
Because of this journey, no one taught him how to love.
When the two faced life and death again, and Cheng Shaoshang, who had experienced the catastrophe, came to him again, he found an opportunity to hug Cheng Shaoshang tightly. In the end, with the efforts of Shaoshang, the two of them reached perfection.
In the process of getting along with the two, Ling Budo's progress was slow and stupid. He had to learn too much.
Want to know how to love someone, how to communicate after a conflict, learn to build a family, and improve the close relationship between family members. For Ling Budo, it is a new chapter in his life.
In the past, he had no such experience as a loner, nor did he have the words and deeds of his parents. He learned a lot of things from Cheng Shaoshang.
Only Cheng Shaoshang becomes mature, Ling Budo can learn more, so he still has to go a long way to achieve happiness.
He must first heal his inner wounds, and then learn to love and live. He also needs Cheng Shaoshang's understanding and acceptance. He has to go a long way to find his inner self and find the happiness he wants.
(The pictures in this article are all from the Internet, if there is any infringement, please contact the author to delete.)
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