-01
The show "Perfect Relationship" is currently on the air, and many people must have seen it.
In the play, Huang Xuan's role, Wei Zhe, is a public relations practitioner who plays a unique role.
recently watched some of these clips. One of them was Wei Zhe, played by Huang Xuan, and talked with the assistant about the criteria for mate selection.
Huang Xuan said in the play his criteria for choosing a spouse:
first: to look good, not too beautiful.
Second: To be capable, not too smart.
Third: There must be mutual needs, this is the basis for being together.
Fourth: We need to have common values so that we can fight side by side when the enemy comes.
Fifth: There must be a chemical reaction, so that after a quarrel, can there be a quarrel at the head of the bed.
Sixth: It is best to have a common language outside of work, so that even if you are old in the future, you can still support each other and chat slowly.
From a realistic point of view, when most men are looking for a marriage partner, they are nothing more than these standards; in fact, the chances of you meeting such a partner are very small.
When a man is looking for a marriage partner, he may not pay much attention to the financial condition of a girl.
But he will look at the three views of this girl, her career, her temperament, her looks and figure.
When a woman is looking for a marriage partner, she often pays more attention to the economic conditions and nature of a man.
Look at his work and income, whether he has a house or a car, whether his character is responsible and reliable; of course, if the man is good-looking and good in figure, it is a bonus.
When you are in love, you may only look at your face. You want to find someone who is good-looking and clean to have a relationship with you; but when you get married, you have to focus on the reality and the perspective of life after marriage. Shape your own standards for mate selection.
-02
Huang Xuan's standard for choosing a spouse in the play actually tells the men a truth: to strike the iron you need to be hard. There is a traditional saying in
: iron needs to be hardened, and embroidery needs to be skillful.
is the same in feelings.
You can set up countless standards for choosing a spouse for yourself. You can go on blind date, fall in love, and get married according to your standards; but the reality is that if you are not up to the standards you put forward, then every time you go on a blind date , Will hit a wall.
Finding an object is like playing a game, fighting monsters and upgrading.
Your own rank is not up to the level of the great god, so don't think about getting into the circle of the great god, it will only make you frustrated in the end.
love is like this. Your own conditions are average, your appearance is average, and your income is average. From any point of view, you are a mean and ordinary person.
But you have created a very illusory standard for choosing a spouse for yourself. You want to find a beautiful girlfriend with a good figure, and the girlfriend is obedient and sensible to make money, and she has a good family background. Why?
is such an excellent girl, who is with you as an ordinary person, so why is she?
Strikes iron still needs to be hard by oneself, not to say how hard the iron is, but the person who strikes behind the iron is harder than iron.
is especially true in feelings.
You have put forward a lot of criteria for choosing a spouse. Your requirements are very demanding and you are very picky; the premise is that you have to be worthy of these requirements.
If you want your future partner to look beautiful and have a good figure, at least you can't be poor; you want your partner to have a high income and strong ability, and your own income cannot be low.
If you want your partner to have three views and a good family background, you should also match.
is not only a good match, but also whether you are worthy of others' love.
is like in love, you care about your partner’s emotional experience, you want to find someone who has never been in a relationship; but there is a premise, the premise is that you have never had emotional experience, and your emotional experience is blank. .
Otherwise, you are not in line with your own mentionYou want your future partner to meet your standards. Isn’t this a typical double standard?
-03
Feelings are different from standards: feelings are chemical reactions in motion, and the standards are immutable.
Many people put forward a lot of criteria for choosing a spouse when looking for a marriage partner.
But these people have overlooked another problem: when you really fall in love with someone, it's just a moment.
If there is a person in your life who makes you fall in love at first sight, this person will instantly make you give up your mate selection criteria, give up some of the standard rules and regulations that you have shaped, after you meet this person, you want to do the only thing One thing is to be with each other.
Love is a chemical reaction in motion. This chemical reaction keeps attracting you to get closer to each other and want to know each other more deeply, until the souls of the two of you hug each other tightly.
And the criteria for choosing a spouse, the harsh conditions proposed are dead and static; people's feelings will change, but the standards will not change.
If you can understand these, you will understand the true feelings, and there is always no conditional fetters.
Have you ever experienced love at first sight?
When Wang Xiaobo and Li Yinhe met for the first time, such a conversation happened.
Wang Xiaobo: Do you have a boyfriend?
Li Yinhe: No.
Wang Xiaobo: What do you think of me?
Actually, Li Yinhe and Wang Xiaobo had never met before. It was just an accidental opportunity. After reading "Green Haired Water Monster" written by Wang Xiaobo, she thought the person who wrote this book must be very interesting.
That was in 1997.
But when Wang Xiaobo fell in love with Li Yinhe at first sight when he first saw a real person, Li Yinhe at that time seemed very disappointed: this man was really ugly.
In addition to the feelings between Wang Xiaobo and Li Yinhe, there are also two familiar people who are also in love at first sight.
Qian Zhongshu said: I am not engaged.
Yang Jiang said: I have no boyfriend.
It was at the gate of Gu Yuetang of Tsinghua University. When the two met for the first time, they were attracted by each other.
Qian Zhongshu wore a pair of glasses, gentle, elegant and humorous; Yang Jiang was lively and lovely.
not only attracted each other in appearance, but after the exchange, the two people also discovered that each other had a common literary interest and hobbies, and they felt like they had seen it before.
In "Dream of Red Mansions", there is a passage about the love at first sight between Jia Baoyu and Lin Daiyu.
When Lin Daiyu came to Jia's Mansion for the first time, she heard that Baoyu was a urchin, and she thought about not seeing it.
never thought that when I first saw Baoyu, I felt strange: "It's so strange, but it's like I've seen it there. How familiar!"
Baoyu also smiled: "I have seen this sister before."
When love When it came, all the criteria for choosing a spouse became nothing.
can also have these standards, depending on who is right; of course it is more possible without these conditions, it can only be on you.
Today’s topic:
meets someone you love at first sight, will you give up your mate selection criteria?
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