people can make mistakes, but can't make mistakes.
Just put down an apology to make you more face-saving. Recently, the topic of "Hu Ge opposes fundraising support" has been searched on Weibo, causing heated discussions among netizens. In May of this year, the film "The Gathering at South Station" starring Hu Ge was shortlisted for the main competition unit of the Cannes International Film Festival. On August 27, @南站’s gathering was announced for December 6th.
In order to support Hu Ge's new movie, fans started a fund-raising event in July. However, on the evening of November 6, the organizer issued a document stating that it would refund the 848,500 donations raised, because such behavior violated Hu Ge's original intention of emphasizing the rational pursuit of stars. Later, Hu Ge posted a long comment on the Weibo post, saying that he was sorry to say that he did not agree with or support the support of fans. The amount of support this time was for both the amount and the final purpose. He can't accept it.
Hu Ge also said to fans: “We must not only have the temperature, but also the character, whether the acting is good or not, the work will work, I am responsible for it, and I will bear it myself. I will win with glory and lose without shame.” Speaking of which, fundraising should be fans. Hu Ge’s self-reported behavior is understandable without an apology, but he felt that it was because of him, so he publicly apologized first and then expressed his opposition. Instead of affecting his image, the apology was praised by netizens, who believed that "this is the right guidance that celebrities should have."
Elton John, a famous British pop music singer and songwriter, once said: "'I'm sorry' is probably the most difficult word to utter." In life, many people know that they are wrong, but they just don't want to take care of face. Apologize, always find various reasons to shirk responsibility. As a result, it complicates the originally small things, intensifies contradictions, and hurts feelings. Not admitting a mistake is a mistake. Saying "I'm sorry" in the face of mistakes is not only a kind of courage and self-cultivation, but also a sign of high emotional intelligence. No one is perfect, it is inevitable that there will be mistakes; if you have a mistake, you are not afraid of it. People with high emotional intelligence will always apologize first in case of trouble, and they will often win the sincere respect of others.
apologizes to family members to reflect love. Gary Chapman, the author of "The Five Languages of Love", once said: "A good apology is the sixth language of love." People with high EQ know home is to talk about love. A place of love, not a place of reason. Therefore, they are always used to reflect on themselves first and take the initiative to admit their mistakes. Such families are often happier and happier, and even if there are quarrels, they will die in apology. Master Nebula told such a story in an article. There are two families, the Zhang family, the family is at odds, and they often quarrel; the Li family does not quarrel, they are very harmonious. The Zhang family felt so strange, why didn't their family quarrel, so they came to the Li family. The Li family replied: "The people in your family are all good people, they are all right and there is nothing wrong, so they quarrel; our family is not, and they all admit their mistakes and feel bad about themselves, so our family stops quarreling." "What's the reason for this? Why do good people quarrel at homes, but not at bad people's homes?" The person surnamed Li said, "Everyone in your family must be good people and think they are right." The person surnamed Li gave an example and explained that a pot of flowers was placed here. Someone in your family broke it by accidentally hitting it on the ground. The person who broke it immediately said loudly: "Who put this flower here? "He didn't think he was wrong to break this flower; another person said, "I let it go. Who told you to knock it down?" Then he quarreled. Everyone thinks they are reasonable and right. This is not the case in our house. One person accidentally broke this potted flower and immediately said: "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I broke this flower." Another person said: "Oh, don't blame you, I shouldn't Put it in this place." Our family admits our mistakes, and of course we don't quarrel. The story told by Master Xingyun is a microcosm of countless families and vividly demonstrates the important role of apology in promoting family harmony. Some couples, obviously they are wrong, but refuse to apologize. They feel that apologizing is short and will make each other look down. As a result, things that had been resolved in one sentence became tumultuous and out of control. Some couples are not like this. They apologize as soon as they are wrong. Sometimes, although it is not their fault, they will take the initiative to admit their mistakes in order not to intensify the conflict and escalate the conflict. As a result, the two sides shook hands and made peace and reconciled. Comparing the two couples, the emotional intelligence of the two couples is higher than that of the judgment. I think of a dialogue in the book "A Little Buddhist Monk": Master, why do some people always apologize first when they quarrel? Because he wants face. To save face... because of this, hisAn apology has more weight. Sometimes an apology does not mean that you are wrong, but precisely because you cherish this relationship. That's great. Because of love and cherishment of each other's relationship, it doesn't matter who admits the mistake first, but family harmony and happiness are more important.
apologizes to my colleagues to show his tolerance. A literary friend told me the story of one of his colleagues. This colleague of his is known as "the king of hard lips." Why do others call him that way? Because no matter what he encounters, he must beat others in his mouth. Even if he is clearly wrong, he will never admit his mistakes. He has to win the opponent before he will give up. After the number of disputes increased, his colleagues in the company were all offended by him. From then on, everyone was reluctant to have any conflicts with him, because everyone knew that no matter how much he argued, he would not admit his mistakes, but ended up hurting. feeling. This colleague, because of his stiff mouth, made everyone not like to get along with him, and they didn't call him for dinner. I have heard such a sentence: People can make mistakes, but can't make mistakes. The netizen’s colleague is a typical muddler. He is obviously wrong, but he refuses to face it. He always finds this reason and that reason to justify himself. Such people have the typical "ostrich thinking" and low emotional intelligence. The ostrich was in danger and plunged into the sand, thinking that no one could see his body. Some people are as stupid as an ostrich when they face their faults. If they don't think about it, they just bury their heads in the sand. Does the problem disappear? Is the matter resolved? People with high emotional intelligence do not have "ostrich thinking". They understand that avoidance cannot solve the problem. Only an apology can solve the problem. An apology does not lower self-esteem and is not ashamed. As the author Liu Tongzai said in "I'm Waiting for You in the Future": "Apologizing is not a shameful thing, it just proves that you are important to me." Actively confessing mistakes to colleagues and cherishing each other's fate reflects a kind of tolerance and high Emotional intelligence. People with high emotional intelligence never cover up, look forward to the future, and suffer from death. Such a person can win the respect and welcome of colleagues.
apologizes to friends to show respect for the mistake made by American best-selling author Littia Baldridge a few years ago. That day, a friend who worked in the United Nations specially prepared a banquet for her and her husband Robert to celebrate Baudrich's writing honor, and invited ambassadors from two countries. Baudrich said: "I should have been honored to attend, but when I wrote this appointment on the memo, I got the date wrong. When the banquet was held, I was watching a movie." Until the next morning, Baudrich After hearing the resentful voice of her friend on the phone, she knew that she had made a big mistake. Baudridge said: "At that moment, my heart is dead!" She apologized over the phone, and then went to her friend's office to regret it. Later, I wrote a more formal letter of apology, full of four pages, and sent it to a friend along with 24 roses. Six months later, she sent more flowers to commemorate the half-year anniversary of her big mistake. At this point, the friend had forgiven Baudrich, but he called her again and said, "I forgive you!" The politician Seneca said that an apology neither hurts the apologizer nor the person who accepts it. . It is inevitable that some unpleasant things will happen to friends. If you are wrong, the best solution is to apologize to the other party in a timely and sincere manner and try to get forgiveness from the other party. This kind of apology does not lose anything to oneself, it is a kind of respect and comfort to the other party, in exchange for rebuilding each other's good. Baudridge’s approach is more wise. She fully expressed her sincere apology to her friends by calling, repenting in person, writing letters of apology, sending flowers, etc., and finally won the understanding of her friends, and the two sides reconciled as ever. The book "The Power of Apology" points out that in many offenses, the offended person feels that their self-esteem or dignity has been insulted and degraded, and an apology is the best way to reduce the harm caused by this humiliation. In addition to alleviating humiliation, an apology can also make the victim feel that he is still "safe" and has not been intentionally attacked.
People with high emotional intelligence never take their own face too seriously, and put the friendship with their friends in a more important position, so they often take the initiative to apologize to reduce the harm caused by their own faults. British poet Marlow said: "Never feel ashamed for admitting mistakes, because admitting mistakes can also mean that you are smarter today." "Knowing mistakes can be corrected, and good things are great." The adult world is not afraid of making mistakes, but afraid of not. Admit the negligence. Apologizing in time, stopping losses and making up in time are the smartest and most appropriate ways to behave. It’s not that hard to say "I'm sorry" first, Actively apologize not only is not shameful, but can reflect your high EQ, demeanor and quality.
