Text | Mi Li’s mother
I remember watching the Spring Festival Gala when I was a child, and Huang Hong and Song Dandan performed a sketch called "Supernatural Guerrilla". I was still young at that time, and my concept of transcendence mainly came from this sketch, but it was a work of art after all.
Later, when I grew up, I realized that art really comes from life. Compared with the sketch, this supernatural phenomenon is only more exaggerated and even more absurd.
Five years ago, a family in Luliang, Shanxi became popular on People's Daily Online. It was the day when their youngest son got married, and it was a lively event with lanterns and colorful decorations.
The best man group is the most exciting thing: the groom’s 11 sisters, wearing red customized T-shirts, each one has a number printed on the clothes, representing which sister of the groom she is.
This family made the vague concept of "superborn guerrillas" that has been in my mind for many years completely concrete. There are 12 children in the family and 11 sisters. The parents were born in their 20s until they were 50 years old.
1 sisters together put together a gift of 320,000 yuan for the younger brother who is regarded as a treasure by the whole family, so that this happy wedding can be held. However, this is not a sad story about patriarchal preference. If you go to fight for these sisters, they will In turn, he accuses you of being nosy.
In their mouths, helping their younger brothers is their natural responsibility, and they do it willingly.
I would like to call them the strongest brother-supporting witch group!
真·超生guerrillas
The family’s surname is Gao. His father, Gao Haigui, was only 23 years old when he married his mother. From then on, they began a long road to having children.
It was 1969 when the eldest sister of the Gao family was born. At that time, there was a serious concept of favoring sons over daughters in the countryside. Most people felt that if you couldn’t give birth to a son, there would be no one to continue the family life, and if you gave birth to a daughter, it would be in vain, because sooner or later, It's someone else's family.
The concept of Lao Gao and his wife is even more like this. If they don’t give birth to a son, they simply can’t hold their heads high in the village.
So they gave birth to one child after another. Unexpectedly, each child was a daughter. The couple grew increasingly disappointed but also increasingly paranoid.
In the blink of an eye, it is the period of family planning, and the whole village is still unable to give birth to a son in Yin Yang's family, while the Gao family already has four daughters.
Having a son has gradually become the obsession of Lao Gao and his wife. They can only leave their hometown and hide around to continue having children. This style of painting is really like the sketch "Superborn Guerrilla".
They had to pay a heavy fine for every child they gave birth to. Although the family was poor and the existing children had difficulty eating, and the Gao family had become one of the most difficult families in the village, Lao Gao and his wife still insisted on continuing to have children.
The children born during that period could not settle down at all. The couple received criticism, education and fines, and then went out to have children again.
Until the policy is relaxed, daughters can settle down and enter school. Until the 11th child was born, Gao Haigui was really discouraged because he was already 50 years old and his wife was 47 years old at that time.
Just when he was about to completely accept the fate of being childless, his wife unexpectedly became pregnant again.
html She gave birth to a child at the age of 47, coupled with the hard work of taking care of the daughters all year round and hiding in Tibet, the wife's physical condition was already very bad.
But the couple still decided to give birth to the child. This time, the 12th child was really a boy.
The couple worked hard for most of their lives and finally got a son. You can imagine how much they cherish it. They named their son Gao Haozhen and they could finally stop having children. When Gao Haozhen was born, the eldest sister was already 27 years old, married and had children.
The 11 sisters in the family, like their parents, dote on their hard-won little brother, and the Gao family has long become the laughing stock of the whole village.
It’s ironic to say that the couple’s obsession was even described by the whole village as an obsession. But in fact, wasn’t it their original incitement and ridicule that made the couple form an obsession?
When you use your life to prove something to others, when you really prove it after years of hard work, they no longer care.
You don’t have that many viewers at all.
Help the younger brother of the girl group
The younger brother who is loved by thousands of people, his academic performance is not good. He barely finished high school and helped out at Ninth Sister's barber shop.
Coupled with the fact that he has been pampered since childhood, the whole family is accustomed to giving him the best, which leads to him spending money lavishly and having no savings of his own.
He dated a girlfriend, and soon her girlfriend became pregnant unexpectedly. He told his sisters about this and said that he wanted to marry his girlfriend.
The sisters were very happy and immediately called 11 people together to discuss. At this time, my parents were already old, and after years of hard work, they were no longer able to take care of much.
1 sisters decided to collect gift money for their younger brother together so that their parents could have a grandson as soon as possible. The sisters also said that he didn't need to worry about money and they would make the wedding a success.
The sisters gathered together 320,000 yuan through negotiation and bought a house for their brother in the county. The remaining money was used as betrothal gifts and weddings.
Now we are back to the scene at the beginning of the article. The 11 sisters wore T-shirts with numbers and held a very grand wedding. They also proudly reported the number:
" I am the eldest sister, I am the second sister, I am the third child, I am the fourth child... ”
The scene was very explosive.
When this famous scene became popular, discordant voices also followed. The prosperous and warm scene of this super-birth family was suddenly exposed by the sober melon-eating people.
Some people say that their family has a throne to inherit? Some people say that their family has a football team, and some people defend their sisters, saying why some people are destined to be promoted and others to be sacrificed?
When the Gao family sister saw this comment, she actually responded: " I don't favor boys over girls, and I don't treat my daughters poorly! Our family just maintains traditional values. What does 320,000 mean? Everyone contributes a little to make up for it. Well, it’s only 30,000 yuan for each person. Isn’t it right for my brother? ”
Well, I can only say that you can never wake up a person who is pretending to sleep. When parents invest their family's only resources in their future sons in order to have a son, allowing their 11 daughters to spend the most impoverished years of their youth, they feel that this is what they should do and that they have not been treated badly.
The most terrifying thing is not the dross concept of favoring boys over girls, but that the victims of this concept are still trying their best to maintain it.
In fact, the person who came forward to refute the rumors was the tenth sister who sacrificed the most and studied best in the family. She had excellent grades since she was a child and was recognized as the top student in the family.
was admitted to a university in Beijing after the college entrance examination, but no one in her family contributed money for her to go to school. She was very aware of her family's financial situation. She saw that her sisters also had to spend money, and even if she had money, she had to spend it with her younger brother. She was like this I voluntarily gave up going to college, took one look at the admission notice, packed my bags quietly, and went to work in the town.
In other words, the younger brother’s gift contains money that the older sister exchanged with her own future. Because of the younger brother’s existence and because of her parents’ obsession with having a son, the older sister simply cannot move towards a better life.
The tenth sister who gave up going to college is actually about the same age as her younger brother. She willingly gave up her life for her brother and used the money she earned from working to finance his wedding, but she is still single. After brother Gao Haozhen's child was successfully born, his mother died of illness due to years of overwork. Gao Haozhen runs her own small family and is also using her own way to repay the help of her sisters.
For example, when the second sister’s son got married, Gao Haozhen gave a big red envelope to his nephew of the same age, and the elder sister was already very satisfied.
In their mouths, they and their younger brother have a two-way family relationship. But only the audience on the outside understands that this is a one-way journey from beginning to end.
Moreover, Mi Li’s mother felt that from the perspective of her sister-in-law, it was actually very painful. Imagine marrying into a family with 11 older sisters, and these older sisters are all highly brainwashed by the concept of favoring boys over girls.
They will automatically assume that you should unconditionally regard men as your first priority, and they will subconsciously ask you to pay as much as they do for your brother.
If you fail to meet their standards at any point, or if you give birth to a daughter but not a son, they will inevitably tease you in front of your younger brother in secret, or even ask you openly.
Marriage is always not a matter of two people, but a matter of two families. There are 11 sisters in the original family who have a serious sense of unworthiness. It is scary to think about it. I can only say that the younger brother's ability to marry a wife is probably because his girlfriend is not experienced in the world.
1 The story of the sisters reminded Mi Li’s mother of the story of the Fu Di Mo who opened a Shaobing shop to support her younger brother → "Super Fu Di Mo" appeared in Anhui. A post-90s girl sold sesame cakes for 12 years just to buy a car and a house for her brother. 》.
This post-90s girl from Anhui is beautiful and capable. She has opened her own bakery for 12 years and bought a car and a house for her younger brother.
Not only that, except for buying a car and a house for her brother, all the money she earned went to her parents.
Many netizens saw a young girl who was already able to take on her own small business and was so capable, so they asked her if she had considered her marriage.
She said she would wait until her brother gets married.
The girl runs two shaobing and beef vermicelli shops. She gets up at 4 o'clock in the morning every day and works in the shop until 10 o'clock in the evening, all year round.
At its peak, she could sell 3,000 sesame seed cakes a day, and she almost baked them all by herself.
She said: " Only when my brother is well, can my parents be well, and when my parents are well, can our whole family be well. "
In her concept, it seems that she has no self. She is a tool in the family as a whole and is completely dedicated to serving the family.
This concept of low self-esteem has an underlying logic, that is: Family is greater than the individual, and men are greater than women.
is the same as the 11 sisters of the Gao family. Their identities are dual. They are victims of bad ideas, but also executors and inheritors.
Their deep sense of unworthiness has been learned since birth, and they have to go through a long transformation to wake up, and this process may take several generations.
Only when they truly realize that they are no one’s appendages and that they are also a complete subject can they truly realize how absurd their previous concepts are.
Thousands of words are useless. They will find various reasons to justify and do everything possible to rationalize their sacrifices. But the cruel thing is that this kind of sacrifice is not reasonable at all, and self-rescue can only be relied on yourself.
Personal profile: @米里马爱Sharing MiLi’s mother, a returnee from the United States and a parent in Haidian. Focus on learning practical information, educational experience and further education.
