The real giving up,
is not about what you give up.
Author: Insight cc
Someone asked a question on Zhihu: What is true separation? The most common answer in the
comment area is: throw away throw away.
It seems that in everyone’s consciousness, getting rid of things you don’t use and living a simple life like a model apartment is the ultimate goal of giving up.
But is this really the case?
After watching the CCTV documentary "The Subtraction of Life", I discovered: Blind separation will only increase people's anxiety and cannot directly bring people happiness.
People who truly know how to make subtractions in life will never only focus on simplification of items.
They often start from these three aspects to make separation truly a lifestyle that suits them.
1
Be careful when buying: The decision to quit does not mean not to buy, but not to buy easily.
In fact, there are very few things that a person really needs in his life. However, most people cannot control their desire to buy.
They regard stocking up as a habit. As a result, as more and more things pile up at home, their happiness plummets.
Under the influence of this mentality, many people feel that since they are about to give up, they simply don’t buy it. The documentary
denies this view and puts forward the point that the decision to abandon does not mean not not buying it, but not buying it easily.
The protagonist in the film is Wenwen, a white-collar worker living in Beijing.
She likes hoarding and shopping very much. She always buys what she wants and never calculates family living expenses.
She can buy the same style of shoes in all colors.
She couldn't bear to throw away the clothes she hadn't worn for many years and the old things she hadn't used.
As a direct result, the items in her home exploded exponentially, and her living space was squeezed into very little.
In her own words: "I feel like I am living in a garbage dump every day."
In such a mess, Wenwen finally made up her mind to change.
For this reason, she specially invited a storage and organizer to come to her home to help with the separation. By sorting and discarding items, she made the home clean and orderly.
In addition, she also followed the organizer's advice and did not buy unless necessary.
and stuck to this habit.
Later, the organizer returned to Wenwen's home with a camera and found that her home was still very tidy, and Wenwen himself lived comfortably. The
documentary said:
We can control the number of items through space, and control people's desires by controlling the number of items, thereby reducing unnecessary consumption and waste.
In the days to come, only buy items that suit you and really need. In this way, you and I can live the best quality life while budgeting carefully.
attaches a shopping list:
1. For necessities, buy them no matter how expensive they are; for unnecessary items, don’t buy them no matter how cheap they are.
2. Don’t buy things you don’t need just to appear gregarious.
3. For items with a single function, check to see if there are any substitutes at home before purchasing.
4. Before going to the supermarket, you can make a shopping list first.
5. You can only buy one piece of clothes, pants, hats and other items of the same style.
6. You can recycle unworn clothes to make money and reduce waste.
2
Make the best use of things: giving up is not about throwing things away, but cherishing things.
This concept originated from Japan.
It means: cut off unnecessary things, discard excess waste, and get rid of obsession with items.
Generally speaking, the original intention of breaking away is not to throw away blindly. Its core is to discard things that you think are redundant.
If throwing something away makes you feel anxious, it goes against the original intention of separation;
If leaving behind some cherished old things makes you feel at peace, it is also a practice of separation. .
The real separation is actually sorting out your own heart.The third episode of the
documentary talks about Wu Kaisi, a post-95s generation who loves to collect old things.
Wu Kaisi is a top student at South China University of Technology. After graduation, he devoted himself wholeheartedly to collecting old objects.
99% of the things in his home are second-hand, including the clothes he wears.
In Wu Kaisi's view, old things have warmth and make him feel an inexplicable sense of intimacy.
Therefore, Wu Kaisi would be particularly devoted every time he collected old things, and he did not care about the opinions of the outside world at all.
Once, a friend asked him: Do you know that when you are picking up garbage or digging through the trash can, many people are there to look at you?
Wu Kaisi smiled and replied:
I enjoy my current state, freedom of thought, finance, and personal freedom. My whole being is free, so I didn’t pay attention to what you said.
Everyone’s energy is limited. Only by giving up unnecessary parts of life can we pay attention to the true needs of our hearts.
Just like what was said in the documentary:
The real decision to give up is not to see what you give up, but to see clearly what you really need.
Learning to make choices is the core of the concept of giving up.
In the days to come, instead of continuing to sink in the abyss of material desires, it is better to eliminate those that should be eliminated and leave those that are worth keeping.
Only in this way can you and I control our own rhythm of life and gain true spiritual freedom.
3
Suit yourself: There is no perfect lifestyle, the one that suits you is the most important.
Eiko Yamashita wrote in "Severance and Detachment":
Severance and Detachment, from a deep perspective, is a kind of organized view of life that lives in the present.
After all, everyone’s tolerance is limited. If the load is too much, the boat of life may capsize.
Only by letting go of the burden and choosing a lifestyle that suits you can this ship sail calmly into the distance. The last episode of the
documentary tells the story of middle-aged cartoonist Liang Xiaoyu.
Liang Xiaoyu was a designer for a game company in his early years.
At that time, his salary was very high, but the high pressure of his work often caused him to consume his body too much and was unable to take care of his family.
Once, he was still in a meeting at two o'clock in the morning. When he was driving, his eyes went dark and he almost fell to the ground. It took him a long time to recover.
Liang Xiaoyu realized that if he continued like this, his body would have major problems sooner or later. What would his wife and unborn child do then?
Thinking of this, he resolutely resigned.
After the exhausting days ended, Liang Xiaoyu started working as a cartoonist at home.
Although his salary is not as good as before, after spending more time with his wife and children, he feels unprecedented peace and satisfaction in his heart. When
later recalled this experience in an interview, he also said with deep feeling:
Breaking away does not mean to abandon all desires, but to face one's truest desires.
When you really know what you want, no matter how hard it is, or not being understood, it doesn't matter, because this is what you really want.
So, the real sense of separation must be to gradually remove those desires and find the true self.
Just like the speaker Joshua said in his speech:
We all need material things to survive, but when we regard those as the most important things, we will ignore the really important things in our lives and ignore our lives. The goal.
Only by removing unnecessary things from your life can you concentrate on your cluttered life and live a happier life.
Life is a journey of wisdom that transforms complexity into simplicity.
Those who cannot learn to get rid of the constraints of material desires and obsessions will be burdened by them and live an extremely heavy life.
Only if you know how to make subtractions in life and follow your own heart to make choices, will the final selection be the light life you want.
▽
CCTV said this when introducing "Subtraction in Life", and I feel the same way:
When will we realize that less is more and that life should be subtracted.
When will we stop and examine our lives?
At this time, we have entered the door of separation.
What all methods of separation teach us is never to throw away, but to find a balance between the material world and the emotional world.
In the process of organizing items, we can sort out our inner uneasiness and gain mental peace.
Mr. Lin Yutang once said: The wisdom of life is to gradually clarify and filter out those unimportant impurities, while retaining the most important parts.
When you know how to choose and simplify your life, you can clear your inner burden and gain insight into the true meaning of happiness.
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