Recommendation丨Liu Yunxia: The afternoon when I met Aunt Yao

2022-12-30 17:04:02 entertainment 159℃

The afternoon I met Aunt Yao

Liu Yunxia

The 98-year-old Huang Shujun was my Aunt Yao, the youngest sister of my grandmother Huang Shulan. There is a ten-year difference in their ages. Nine years have passed since my grandmother passed away, and my aunt Yao is still alive. When I think of my grandmother, I also think of my aunt Yao, and sometimes I even think of them as one person. I haven't seen Aunt Yao for eight years. It's not that I don't miss her, but I dare not see her. This time I think I can do it. I have been brewing for a long time. The planning started almost after the Spring Festival. Shaxi Que, Maojia Village, Longhua, was the afternoon of the first day before the Ching Ming Festival, a 38-minute drive, and it was guided by a stranger like a stranger. Just as in memory, Aunt Yao's hair was as white as snow, and her eyes were like torches. Both she and her grandmother are as wise as the sea.

She didn't know we were going. At first I sat across from her with my back to the light. The collar of her thin cotton-padded jacket with red flowers on a black background was turned up to wrap around her neck. This feeling makes my heart beat. I am reminded of the floral shirt my grandmother wanted. I have a feeling of going back to the past. She stared at me quietly for a while and then asked: "This is? Who are you?" I smiled without saying a word. The family members told her it was Yunxia. "Yunxia? Sit over here and let me have a look!" Her voice suddenly rose, urgent and deep. I sat on her side facing the light. She turned her head and looked at me very much like my grandmother, as if she had something to say to me but didn't need to say it. I know what she's going to say. Just for a second or two, her eyeballs jumped out in surprise: "It really is Yunxia!"

The outdoor sun was warm, and Aunt Yao's eyes shone brightly. It was difficult for her to move around, and the family supported her into the shadow under the longan tree with their arms crossed. Her words were shocking and humorous: "Like lifting..." After she finished speaking, she laughed, laughed, and everyone burst into laughter. She said it was like lifting a dead pig. I know it's disrespectful to say it from my mouth or from my pen. But from the perspective of experience, Aunt Yao seems to be very casual, but in fact she realizes that she is the ancient city of Pompeii that will eventually be swallowed by old age. She said that when it is foggy, it will be sunny, and the mountain fog will be clear and the river will be foggy and rainy. She said Yunxia, I will recognize you, and I will recognize you in a thousand years. She didn't talk about the past, not a word. She put her hands quietly on her knees, she spoke very little, and every word was her feeling at the moment. Except for the sudden shock when I heard my name, I was neither extremely excited nor particularly excited afterwards, and my expression was as calm as calm water and as peaceful as a breeze.

I recognized the crutch when the family supported her to move outside with difficulty. It was given to her by my grandmother, and it was also given to my grandmother - my grandmother chose this one as a relic for the youngest sister from several crutches I bought for her that were different in material and color. Grandma's handprints still remained on its skin, and the smell of paint, wood and grandma's sweat on its body still persisted... Immediately, my heart was boiling. After sitting down on the rattan chair, Aunt Yao, who was safe and sound, handed over the crutch without looking at me: "Take it, and lean on it." Immediately, the tears could no longer be controlled, and they rushed like a sea breaking a bank.

I have some feelings, although I haven’t seen her for many years, Aunt Yao knows too well...

Over the years, I have written a lot of words to commemorate my grandmother. I am attached to my grandmother. A few years before her death, her grandmother said more than once, "No one can cry when I die, but Yunxia must cry." She was right. One year after she left, I wrote "Grandmother in the Wind" with tears in my eyes and dared not write for three whole months.

My mother never hugged and kissed me, and my father never did. If my grandmother treated me like they did, I wouldn't love her any more. When I was wronged, only my grandmother would hold me in her arms, stroke my back and pat my head. I longed for such caresses so badly. I was greedy for my grandmother's kindness, affection, and love, and I would suffer terribly without her. By the side of my grandmother in Shitougou, I feel at home, and my eyes shine brightly. Especially after my mother left, I was even more attached to the love expressed by my grandmother's eyes, body and soft words.

My Kutanggou is a few kilometers away from Shitougou where my grandmother lives. Even just looking in the direction of the stone ditch, I feel that the days have become beautiful as if they suddenly jumped out of the ice cellar. The strong desire in my heart drove me to always run to my grandmother's house regardless of my father's stop, no matter how he threatened and scolded me. Every morning I go to school from Kutanggou, and I will be in Shitougou after school in the afternoon. Grandma always chased me home. It's been a while, and there's still a way to go. She stood on the ground with a cane and watched me go down the mountain. I turned my head three times a step at a time, and always saw the pair of sad and sad eyes on her wrinkled face.. The more she couldn't hide her distress for me, the more I tried to get close to her.

"The friendship between our grandparents and grandchildren is as deep as the sea and as thick as mountains." I think she used the word "grandfather and grandson" on her lips, and the way she looked at me clearly regarded me as a close friend.

Eight years ago, that is, the second year after my grandmother passed away, Aunt Yao was at the 90th birthday banquet. In front of dozens of tables of close relatives, cousins, acquaintances and strangers, I saw Aunt Yao who looked exactly like my grandmother. I cried so badly that my aunt Yao cried too, and attracted many uncles and aunts to watch, comfort, discuss, sympathize and shed tears. Since then, whenever I think about such a sad and embarrassing scene, I feel uncomfortable, and I blame myself for being weak and powerless. Another name for

is Huang Jicheng, and another name for Aunt Yao is Huang Jiqing, which is their scientific name. Great-grandfather was a private school teacher, full of knowledge but not pedantic. He bravely broke his daughter's house and was the first to stay in the embroidered building for darning, and let his grandmother and her sisters enter the school. He didn't expect them to be erudite, well-informed, talented, and have lofty ambitions to serve the country faithfully. He just hoped that they would study and learn, learn to think, have a benevolent heart, and acquire profound cultivation in the process of acquiring knowledge. Grandmother is the third child among ten siblings, and Aunt Yao is the tenth child. Ten is Man. Her parents call her "Man'er", which integrates the Erhua accent of Beijing dialect and the level accent of Jiangjin dialect, which is gentle, tactful and kind. Grandma followed suit by calling her "Man'er".

Grandmother is closest to Aunt Yao. From January to February, no more than three months at most, Aunt Yao will definitely bring a change of clothes to Shitougou for a short stay for a few days. In and out, back and forth, they are inseparable. They will also come to Kutanggou together. I followed them as eagerly as a fart. Grandmother and Aunt Yao are both masters at playing dragons. Every generation has its own Longmen Formation. Unlike our generation who put TV, movies, struggle, the ordinary world, and the human world, their generation put Beijing opera put Sichuan opera , and it’s about the horrible resurrection of the dead who are dissatisfied with the burial place, and their family arrangements. The dissatisfied groom left the bride to stay alone in the empty room on the wedding night, the rumbling gunfire from the Liberation of Chongqing, and the uncle Yao brought a water stick from the Yangtze River . Sometimes it is a fact of personal experience: Hejiang ’s relatives cook meat with only a handful of salt and no other condiments. The white eyebrows and white eyes are unpalatable. In the cow dung, Lao Diao next door quarreled with his daughter-in-law, a lunatic who was diligent in writing but could not write well. Sometimes I also talk about the current affairs of the family and the country: From the dirt road to the foreign highway, it used to be half a day's walk to Shitougou, and now it only takes an hour by bus. How could a nuclear submarine sink for no reason? The stories follow one another. Sometimes I laugh, sometimes I sigh. From a few years old to a teenager, in the middle of the night, mostly in Shitougou, occasionally in Kutanggou, I squeezed with them on an old gum bed or an old wooden canopy bed, staring quietly in the dark mosquito net, holding my breath I heard my aunt and grandmother who were visiting relatives in Shitougou telling stories with great interest. I see the world in their laughter, sighs and sighs.

Grandma used to be proud that her natal family was a respectable and big family in the local area, and she and her sisters were ladies of all ages. "Shulan" and "Shujun" are really nice. Few people know the scientific name of "Jicheng", and I only found out the scientific name of "Jiqing" after I went to see Aunt Yao this time and asked her. No one in Aunt Yao's family has ever heard of her. " Book of Rites " says, "Young name", "Guanzi", and "Death posthumous title", leave you here for the rest of your life. "Young name" is the name given to you when you were young. Generally, you will be given a nickname first, that is, your baby name. When you go to school, you will be given a training name, also called a scientific name, which is convenient for teachers to call you. If it is a man, the scientific name may be the name he walks in the rivers and lakes in the future. In the era of serious male superiority and female inferiority, some behaviors of women are restricted, and no matter whether they have a scientific name or not, they cannot change their fate. They have never had the opportunity to walk the rivers and lakes in their lives. Aunt Yao had never had her feet bound, but her spiritual bindings had not been loosened. Aunt Yao taught for a year, and she was the only female teacher in the rural primary school. Aunt Yao, who is handsome, slim, and serious in teaching, is respected by parents and students unanimously. The neighbors condemned her morally. Women must abide by the three obediences and four virtues , and must not show their faces, otherwise it is a violation of ethics. Aunt Yao was overwhelmed by gossip. Unable to bear the pressure, the uncle's family persuaded her to give up her beloved classroom and return to the family, cooking like all the women who attacked herFeed pigs and have babies.

"Girls can't eat the tip of the pig's trotters. After eating it, they won't be able to marry off." I put the tip of the pig's trotter into the bowl. My father said that, and I didn't know what to do.

"Why can't you get married? Still believe in those heresy? That's an excuse not to eat delicious food. Yunxia, eat it, don't worry." With Aunt Yao's permission, I can eat other girls wantonly The tip of the pig's trotter, which children can't eat, can also be eaten openly, which is said to be forgetful. She transplanted a woman's struggle against the world into me. She wants me to fulfill her unfinished wish.

Aunt Yao often comes to stay for a while, but my uncle rarely comes. Uncle was once recruited by the Kuomintang to work as a strong man. The head of Baojia in the village took a bribe and changed someone's name to Uncle. Uncle and Aunt Yao were engaged, so they had to reluctantly follow the army to Chongqing. On the eve of the liberation of Chongqing in 1949, the Kuomintang withdrew and was ready to board the ship in Fujian. My uncle had a stomachache. After he resolved the internal emergency, the ship carrying the Kuomintang officers and soldiers had already left the shore. By mistake, my uncle avoided the 40-year-long lovesickness between the two places, and was able to return to Shaxi Bay to reunite with Aunt Yao.

Although Shaxi Bay is by the Yangtze River, Aunt Yao’s family does not cultivate fertile land, and has no other income other than the fields, so life has been miserable. The kind, honest, and not well-to-do grandmother always tries to help her. The crutch should have been given to Aunt Yao after I bought it back.

That afternoon, I went to see Aunt Yao Huang Shujun. When I went home that night, I couldn't get over my emotions. It took me 30 minutes to vent my emotions on WeChat, and I shed tears for three hours. The next day, my eyes were red and swollen.

Grandma and her sisters are all long-lived, and they all have such a pair of eyes: as bright as a mirror, insight into the details, and a clear mind to see nature. Uncle passed away many years ago. Aunt Yao's two sons also died of illness several years ago. Aunt Yao sat on the wicker chair, looking down at the world like a Bodhisattva. Some mortal desires are drawn out, warm, deep, and introverted. She is in the dojo of the world of mortals, and she lives with a century of tolerance.

"Take it, give it a push." Aunt Yao didn't say anything, but said everything. She and my grandmother worked together to inject into my bones and blood the long rain and mist, the faint moonlight they had seen, and the moist monsoon that my skin felt. Only I can understand her words. She has taught. I'm a teacher. Our genetic inheritance. She regarded me as a peer with the same experience and the same emotion. That afternoon, my aunt Yao and I missed our grandmother.

Aunt Yao's body did not dare to step out of the circle drawn with the crutch as the radius. She overcomes the desolation with one heart, and her spiritual vision is verdant and verdant, which has already crossed the horizon. The afternoon when

met Aunt Yao Huang Shujun, I think I gained strength.