From "like" acquaintances in the circle of friends to "matching up" friends in life, from talking about everything and being intimate to keeping distance and paying attention to boundaries, currently, young people's social methods and social needs have shown many New changes. Rec

From "like" acquaintances in the circle of friends to "matching up" friends in life, from talking about everything and being intimate to keeping distance and paying attention to boundaries, currently, the social methods and social needs of young people are showing Many new changes. Recently, a survey of 1,333 young people conducted by the China Youth Daily Social Survey Center and Wenjuan.com showed that 77.4% of the young people surveyed felt that "lightweight" social interaction was becoming more and more common. There is no need to invest a lot of energy and time in maintaining emotions, and the emphasis on boundaries and private space is the main reason why young people choose "lightweight" social interaction.

"The pursuit of simple and pure relationships is the natural emotional need of many young people."

Wang Haosen, a post-90s generation who works in Hangzhou, usually likes to play table tennis, but it is difficult to find friends with similar interests around him. Later, he found a few golfers through the introduction of the staff at nearby arenas, and they established contact with each other. When he wanted to play, he just said hello in the group, and he was able to successfully set up a game soon. Wang Haosen feels that compared with friends who need to be maintained for a long time, it is easier to make friends with this kind of "ball match". You don't even need to know the other person's name or occupation. You only need to see whether the level matches and whether the temperament is congenial. "Nowadays, 'hookup' dating is becoming more and more common, and 'study hookup' and 'sports hookup' are all very common. This kind of dating method can find a more suitable partner in a short period of time, saving time and effort."

"I am a person who is prone to internal friction. I often doubt myself because of other people's evaluations." Li Siqi, a post-1995 generation who works in Beijing, said that she is relatively passive in social interactions and basically does not take the initiative to organize situations. Most of the time are both participants and listeners, and are easily influenced by what others say. "I prefer that social relationships can be simpler, and I can gain happiness from them instead of burdens."

"Happiness" socializing, game socializing... Nowadays, young people's ways of making friends are becoming more and more diverse, simple, easy and stress-free" "Lightweight" social networking has become the choice of many young people. The survey shows that 77.4% of the young people surveyed feel that "lightweight" social networking is becoming more and more common. Further analysis found that the proportion of respondents born after 2000 believed that it was becoming more and more common was even higher, at 81.9%.

Zhang Xiaofang, a doctoral candidate at the School of Marxism at Nankai University, has conducted research on the phenomenon of "light social interaction" among young people. She believes that compared with traditional social interaction, "light social interaction" has several characteristics: First, "fast food", this kind of social interaction It is low-cost, fast, and temporary, just like eating fast food, and is less constrained by time and space; second, it is lightweight. Compared with traditional social interactions, its form of communication is more fragmented, such as through expressions You can complete a communication through packets and voice. There is no need for very standardized social etiquette and rigorous social language, and there is no need to invest a lot of time and emotion. The third is privacy. The two parties do not need to exchange their own private information, such as name and occupation. , family, region, etc., even if you don't know all kinds of information about the other party, you can still complete the interaction; the fourth is accuracy, such as "matching" social interaction, in order to achieve a common goal, through the matching of interests and hobbies, accurately find the right person Form a partnership with the person you want; another characteristic is consumption. In the virtual network space, you do not need to have in-depth communication with the other party. Instead, you need to like and comment. In form, it is communication between subjects, but in essence However, it is no different from the human-machine mode in games and online shopping. It is a consumer-style social satisfaction. "From a realistic point of view, the pursuit of simple and pure relationships is the natural emotional need of many young people."

How does

view some young people's choice of "lightweight" social interaction? The survey shows that 54.4% of the young people surveyed believe that it does not require a lot of energy and time to maintain emotions, 50.4% of the young people surveyed believe that it reflects the importance of boundaries and private space, and 46.9% of the young people surveyed feel that it can relieve mental stress and make the body and mind happy. 40.0% of the young people surveyed believe that this social method is temporary, efficient and low-cost. Others include: it can broaden the circle of friends and get to know different people (35.9%), it is a shallow and "fast food" way of communication (30.4%), and it is an escape and resistance to deep relationships (12.8%).

"You need to have a certain sense of boundaries in communication." From this perspective, Li Siqi agrees with "lightweight" social interaction. She said that this sense of boundaries not only refers to physical distance, but more importantly, psychological distance, such as Do not force others to agree with your point of view, do not judge others, etc. "Having a sense of boundaries is a sign of respect for a relationship and respect for the person you are interacting with."

Deep social networking cannot be completely replaced by "lightweight" social networking

"It is very important to have a few fixed and long-term friends." Wang Haosen believes that a person's energy and time are limited. If you only pursue the simplification and lightness of social interaction, Quantification is not conducive to individuals establishing in-depth social relationships. "If you want to maintain a friendship, even if you don't meet often, it is still necessary to contact and greet each other from time to time. Relationships are born out of 'place', and sometimes you need to be more proactive."

Li Siqi said that although she doesn't like the lack of boundaries in the dating model, But I still think it is necessary to maintain a deep relationship. "When you encounter dissatisfaction or difficulties at work, you can complain to your friends and get understanding and comfort from them. You will feel much better. This is something that is difficult to achieve with 'nodding' acquaintances."

Excessive pursuit of "lightweight" social interaction will cause What problems does it bring? The survey shows that 63.5% of the young people surveyed believe that this will lead to a lack of close friends and weakened social network support. 57.9% of the young people surveyed said that it will make friends "circular" and easily fall into an "information cocoon". 48.0% The young people surveyed believe that it will weaken the connection between people and indifferent relationships. 47.0% of the young people surveyed are worried that it will be difficult to establish long-term and stable intimate relationships. 18.2% of the young people surveyed said that it may increase their personal loneliness.

Hu Penghui, a teacher at the School of Sociology at Huazhong University of Science and Technology, believes that "lightweight" social interaction within a moderate range is a normal social need for young people, and there is no need to worry too much. However, excessive pursuit of so-called pure, simple, and efficient social interactions will cause some problems. "Whether it is at work or in daily life, learning to communicate effectively with others is an important ability. Excessive pursuit of 'lightweight' social interaction will continue to weaken one's awareness of deep social interaction and have a negative impact on one's social ability. "

"Social interaction is a natural need for people, and deep social interaction cannot be completely replaced by 'light' social interaction. "Zhang Xiaofang believes that people choose "light social interaction" in order to find people with similar interests. Through Internet screening, they have already Relatives, friends, and colleagues of different ages and levels are divided into different ranges. Overemphasis on "lightweighting" social interactions will, over time, exclude interactions with acquaintances and relatives to the periphery of one's personal social circle, which is not conducive to the establishment and maintenance of strong personal relationships. "We must recognize the diversity and complexity of social interactions, and at the same time face up to the various irregularities and conflicts in social interactions, integrate self-exploration and self-expression into real social life, and avoid falling into virtual or completely 'lightweight' "Among the respondents surveyed by

, 45.2% were men and 54.8% were women; 16.6% were born after 00, 29.9% were born after 1995, 34.8% were born after 90, and 18.7% were born after 85; and they are unmarried. 14.7% are not in love, 19.4% are unmarried but in a relationship, 64.4% are married, and 1.5% are divorced.

(Li Siqi is a pseudonym at the request of the interviewee)

Text/Wang Zhiwei

Editor/Ni Jianing