At the end of last year, friends from the south went north one after another and saw the heavy snowfall in the north. At the beginning of this year, the return of from the south to from the south shocked the people of the north.
People in the north have dry skin on their lips in the dry spring breeze, while people in the south can go to heaven at any time in the fairyland of the south.
Yes, this is the legendary place where water drips from the ceiling, fogs up the mirrors, the elevator fails, and you have to use an umbrella when going to the toilet.
As soon as you return to Nantian, all the life experiences you have learned after living for decades will become useless.
Dried noodles will become "fresh noodles", potato chips will become dumpling wrappers, and your home will become a beach.
"While walking on the road, my smart watch showed that I was swimming."
"Took a deep breath and choked on the water."
Cantonese people have a lot to say about the various urban legends about returning to Nantian.
A friend from Beijing (rubbed his eyes) (suffered from rhinitis in a dry environment) (after sneezing countless times) asked: "It's so humid, the humidity must be 70 or 80%, right?"
A friend from Guangdong (twisted his clothes) (wiped the water drops on his body) (put away his umbrella and left the toilet) replied: "The humidity is seventy or eighty percent, which is called dry for us!"
Someone I simply published the test data of 100% air humidity: No joke, we Cantonese people will automatically grow gills to help us breathe when we return to Nantian.
For northerners who have been dry and rough all their lives, returning to the south brings some visual shocks.
The couplets posted only during the Chinese New Year are "hua" when they say "hua". It also turned into trickling streams, the black ones were like hair, and the red ones were like blood...
always said that Chinese horror is the scariest. The moment I saw the couplet of Hui Nantian, I really felt it.
went back to Nantian to visit, and a murder scene randomly appeared.
If you have posted couplets at home, don’t order takeout when you return to Nantian. Which rider dares to reach out and knock on the door?
It’s just that there is water vapor and mist in the air, why is it still filled with an evil spirit? If you don't have the guts, you won't dare to go out at night when you return to Nantian. You will almost fall into the underworld.
Whenever there is a long corridor in a building, the scary atmosphere will be even stronger.
Don’t panic when you encounter danger, take a photo first and post it online: Someone, please tell me, is the person walking across the street holding an ax?
In this "abnormal" environment, words become spiritual. What
wrote on the whiteboard the day before, became Oracle the next day.
"Don't run" ran away.
"Losing weight" became losing weight.
"direction" has completely lost its direction.
The more I look at it, the more it looks like some wonderful message left by aliens.
The last time I was shocked by this encrypted language was when I heard "You have such a high-speed machine entering China. Remember the principle I gave when I was young" .
Regarding the anecdotes about returning to the south on the Internet, northerners regard them as curious and even a little envious, but southerners are really miserable.
Before going out every day, I have to face a soul torture, Should I wear wet clothes or dirty clothes?
The dehumidifier works until it sparks, and it can pump out a full bucket of water in two hours.
If this is the legendary generous gift of nature, then this musty gift is really worth noting.
At this time, some netizens patiently asked their friends in the south to popularize science: Do you know that many northerners have humidifiers in their homes?
Southerners: Now we understand the significance of the South-to-North Water Diversion Project.
Some houses with aging circuits will leak electricity everywhere when they get wet. If you are not careful, you may be injured by electricity.
Looking at the electric test pen shared by this netizen, it seems that I saw Hui Nantian himself dancing on the circuit. Does he want me to go back to the south or does he want me to go back to the west?
When I met Hui Nantian, not only did my family change, but the people also became human-like and ghostly.
's hair was dried before going out, and it became tangled after sitting at the work station for only a few minutes. 's barcode bangs are the best proof of Hui Nantian's existence. , no matter how powerful his dry hair spray is, he has to avoid it.
It is recommended to stop the dream of having a high skull.
In this season, it is not easy for us to maintain the original appearance, so don’t expect the icing on the cake.
Friends who live on sofas and roll rolls will end up "returning to their original shape" when encountering Hui Nantian.
combined with the smoky outdoor environment, looks like a moving giant steel ball from the back.
It’s enough to bear this. The loyal netizens in Guangdong issued a friendly reminder: It’s better not to travel during this period. If you come, remember to bring more disposable underwear.
Because it can’t be dried after washing ~
If you think that returning to Nantian only caused some inconvenience in life (and image), then these solid somersaults will tell you that the lethality of returning to Nantian is far more than that. .
According to Shenzhen official data, just one day after returning to Nantian, 47 innocent people called 120 for injuries due to slippery falls.
Thirty of them are young adults aged 20-59.
This is the number of people who have had to seek medical treatment for serious falls.
So those friends who fell flat on the ground for no reason at home and can only silently lick their wounds alone may be as numerous as the momos on the Internet...
Sometimes, even if you escape, Other symptoms may also appear in the fate of orthopedic reports.
Many netizens shared that they experienced various physical discomforts during their return to Nantian: chest tightness, head swelling, bone seams as if they were rusty, and shoulders as if they were being pressed by two mountains.
Back to Nantian, it is not only humans who are harmed, but also kittens and puppies who live closely with humans.
It is painful to meet southerners who return to Nantian, and it is even more painful to meet southern dog breeders who return to Nantian.
There are water curtain holes everywhere. If a dog falls to the ground, it will be like a drowned dog. We dare not put it underground at all.
But I still have to go to the regular toilet every day, so I can only carry the dog downstairs for convenience, achieving a beautiful picture of "the dog goes downstairs and I burn fat".
However, no matter how good the protection is, it cannot prevent the dog from fully contacting the moisture in the air. Within a few days of returning to Nantian, the puppy gradually turned into a dirty dog, a moldy dog, and a stinky puppy .
The puppy didn’t know what happened. The puppy just felt that walking had become difficult these days and he couldn’t get to where he wanted to go. As soon as
entered the door, a mysterious force sent it to the root of the wall, and there was a fierce competition.
Maybe the owner cast some kind of spell to get home quickly?
The little kitten who lives at home cannot escape the fate of slipping when walking back to the south.
was taking the same steady steps as before, but his hind legs just kept moving step by step, and 's usual vitality suddenly became out of control.
Compared with puppies becoming moldy and smelly, Hui Nantian may have a function that is barely considered beneficial to cat owners.
The long-haired stuffed animal that could not be combed smoothly and had knotted hair all over its body was given a painless ion perm by Hui Nantian. It became silky, supple and visually reduced in weight.
Friendly reminder: Cats are still cute even if their hair is flattened, but for humans, flattened skulls may cause disaster, so please follow suit with caution.
The "Tom and Jerry" documentary will tell you the truth. If the conditions are met, the cat will turn into a bowling ball.
Human beings are complaining incessantly, cats and dogs are unable to move even an inch, and only plants are particularly vital in the season of returning to the south.
Some netizens shared that after a winter when the plants were frozen to the point of wilting, the plant corners grew lush and green after just a short trip back to the south.
Not only the flowers and plants, but also the onions and garlic placed on the windowsill have begun to grow again. I have to admire the magic of nature.
In order to end this farce of two people being favored and hurt, many people are offering suggestions on how to deal with Hui Nantian.
Dijiang searched on the Internet and found the most effective solution. The only solution is: should not open the window as much as possible! Don't open the window! Don't open the window!
After all, in this era of making memes, no matter how novel your knowledge of Hui Nantian is, for southerners who have experienced it since childhood and struggled with it every year, it is still just a common and natural thing. It's just a phenomenon.
No matter how much they are tortured, it cannot stop them from developing some joy in suffering.
The southerners with a broken appearance but interesting souls invented a very new art form - Back to the Nantian Hand-painting Exhibition. On mirrors, on glass, on ceramic tiles... everywhere they turn grief and anger into creation.
College students have fully integrated self-expression into such creations.
In this seasonal limited Hui Nantian art exhibition, everyone’s mental state is surprisingly stable ~
Perhaps because they are afraid that northerners will be too greedy, the southerners who create in Hui Nantian have developed a new business: Professional Copywriting.
html costs 05 yuan a time, which is expensive for a reason, because it is really too trendy. JJ Lin said: If you are not trendy, you don’t have to spend money.Last winter, northerners helped southerners ghostwrite in the snow; this spring, southerners helped northerners ghostwrite on glass.
How can it not be regarded as a joyful party between the North and the South?
In another event where netizens from the north and south gathered together, Hui Nantian officially came to an end. Good news: After returning to Nantian, everyone can finally open the windows for ventilation.
In this bad weather, everyone is making jokes, learning tips on how to deal with returning to Nantian, and cursing the bad "ghost weather".
The weather is uncontrollable, but the fun in life can be discovered with heart.
Because we all know that no matter how bad the haze is, there will always be a day when the spring is warm and the flowers are blooming and the rain is over..