I don't know when divorce became a "fashion".
If you don't believe me, watch internal entertainment.
's hottest emotional variety show is "Goodbye Lover". The most popular move of
is the official divorce announcement.
's various divorce jokes are the traffic passwords of social platforms.
False news that "the Civil Affairs Bureau has no queue for marriage, and the divorce line is long" appears from time to time.
can always harvest a large wave of discussions, which has been tried and tested.
Uncle Yu recommends marriage-themed movies to everyone every time.
's most liked comments are always: "leave now" or "don't want to end".
shows everyone's attitude towards marriage.
But, today I want to talk about something different.
has a 20-year-old domestic documentary with a score of 9.1 on Douban.
tells the story of a group of "women who don't want to divorce".
They actually do everything possible, even forcing each other to death, just to stay in a seemingly unhappy marriage.
sounds outrageous, but it was only after digging down that I discovered the secret behind it.
what's going on here?
Let’s take a look here—
"The History of Chinese Women in the 20th Century"
A Woman Who Doesn’t Want a Divorce
In 1984, a woman named Wang Yongzhen went to court with her husband. After
heard the court's divorce judgment, she turned and glanced at her husband. Afterwards,
took out the poison that he carried with him.
committed suicide in full view of the court . In the nineteen months since the
incident, the court dared not issue another divorce case. The appalling case of
seems incomprehensible today.
But at that time, there were many women who did not want to divorce because of the "broken relationship between husband and wife". Among them,
broke through cognition the most, and it was the " Qin Xianglian Petitioning Group " that caused a sensation all over the country.
There are 36 women in this petitioning group.
The object of their complaint is the husband who requested a divorce on the grounds of "broken relationship". Among the members of
, some usually work "three shifts", and come straight after work with dry food.
Some brought crying young children with haggard faces.
They really look like Qin Xianglian who was abandoned by Chen Shimei.
Before petitioning, they tried their best to prevent their husbands from divorcing:
friends, family members of their natal family, family members of their husbands, and anyone who could talk to their husbands had all asked for help; influential newspapers and magazines were full of
Even women's federations, courts, and public security bureaus all over the country have their footprints.
They worked so hard, all to maintain their marriage with their cheating husband.
This seems to be somewhat different from ordinary people's cognition.
Since ancient times, women have been victims of the feudal marriage system.
Words of the family, child brides, arranged marriages, these contents are already commonplace.
The nature of feudal marriage was cruel to women.
In the past, this system of destroying women was supported by the laws and culture of the feudal state, and individual strength could not resist it.
But when the system was overthrown, the vast majority of women at that time still could not escape this nightmare.
Grandma Jiang and her fiancé have been engaged in child marriage since childhood.
In 1950, she joined a troupe and used her singing to promote the new marriage law.
The concept of "freedom of marriage and equality between men and women" is deeply rooted in her mind. At the same time, the fiancé's parents strongly object to the future daughter-in-law's publicity.
In order to let his younger brother study, his father owed a lot of money to his fiancé's family.
In the end, Grandma Jiang was sent to her husband's house as debt-paying goods.
Later, she often laughed at herself:
I promoted the Marriage Law, and even became a victim of the Marriage Law.
This kind of situation not only happens in rural areas, but also in developed cities.
In Nanjing, if the man has three wives and four concubines, according to the law, the woman can propose to dissolve the relationship between husband and wife.
but this isIf the woman does not file a case of a private prosecution nature, the government will ignore it.
Many lawyers have worked for a lifetime, but have never received a divorce case, and three wives and four concubines are still the norm.
Culture plays a very important role compared to the hysteresis of the system.
In 1980, for the first time, "emotional breakdown" was written into the new "Marriage Law" as a legal ground for divorce.
This is precisely due to the urgent need to speed up the resolution of problems left over from history.
However, it is this law that seems to be very progressive today, but it has aroused strong opposition from many women.
why?
In fact, the women who complained also had difficulties.
It is the progressive nature of the law that transcends society, which has caused this group of women to suffer from it.
Many successful men despise "dirty wives".
They filed for divorce under the slogan "Marriage without love is immoral".
At that time, the law on the division of property between husband and wife was far less perfect than it is today.
Many women who have contributed a lot to their families can only be forced to divorce, watching their husbands "eating sweets and drinking spicy food" with third parties.
At that time, this phenomenon caused many discussions.
In the end, the drafting team of the new "Marriage Law" still gave more consideration to the fate of rural women who accounted for the majority of the female population, who were oppressed and unable to escape.
Women who do not want to untie their foot wraps
The women of the "Qin Xianglian Complaint Group" would probably be ridiculed by the crowd if they were put into the present.
They "can't do without" men, and fight for divorce with their lives.
The documentary allows us to see the deeper sorrow. Not only that, but the film also depicts another phenomenon that is difficult for contemporary women to understand-
Many women find it hard to let go of bound feet.
To people today, footbinding is a recognized feudal dross.
Gravel, rubble, and porcelain shavings penetrated deeply into the woman's body under the action of the foot wrap.
Accompanied by endless pain, blood flowed out, and limbs were twisted.
What is wrapped up is not only a mutilated body, but also the ability to survive independently.
Foot binding has caused irreversible damage, making women unable to participate in heavy labor and losing their qualifications to have independent personalities.
But this kind of torture has made countless girls sacrifice their lives to protect them.
In the 1930s, the anti-footbinding movement was at its climax, and the government would send personnel to the countryside to supervise and inspect. After commissioner
arrived, the women who hadn't let go would quickly hide, but one girl couldn't hide in time.
She was forced to take off her shoes and be examined. During the process of
, the two sides had a quarrel, which caused a large number of villagers to watch.
The girl thought it was a great disgrace and committed suicide by jumping into the well that day.
Thirty years after the ban on foot binding was promulgated, there are still not a few women with feet bound in all provinces.
The proportion of women's feet bound in many provinces is even more than half.
It took almost half a century of before we liberated women from foot wraps.
At the end of the Qing Dynasty and the beginning of the Republic of China, it took only a few years for 200 million men to cut off their long braids.
In contrast, Fang showed the difficulty of letting go. Why is
like this?
Because what is bound and imprisoned is not only the feet, but also the self-awareness of women .
When they were growing up, footbinding was the standard for judging women's beauty and ugliness.
In many places in the Qing Dynasty, there were competitions for the selection of "'s most beautiful little feet ".
Women lined up on the steps, taking off their shoes and exposing their feet for the comments of passing men.
The irony is that the places selected are often selected in temples.
There was even a kind of " cup shoes " during the Republic of China.
Many "champions" who prefer footbinding will ask the women who accompany them to take off their shoes when they are on the rise.
They put the glass in the shoe and drank it down.
In feudal society, this aesthetic preference came entirely from men.
The reason behind why men like "three-inch golden lotus" is not simple.
The "Naughty Girl" clearly pointed out that footbinding is not for looking good, but to prevent the heroine from going out .
In essence, footbinding is a method used by patriarchal society to destroy and oppress women through social aesthetic culture.
But when women are powerless to resist, accepting torture becomes a sign of virtue.
You can't choose your appearance and family background, but you can achieve small feet through footbinding.
In the cruel feudal society, foot binding, a way of self-destructiveness, has instead become a choice for women to survive.
As a result, foot binding became more and more popular, and the foot bindings became tighter and tighter.
Them and us
"The History of Chinese Women in the 20th Century" is like an "encyclopedia" forged with blood and tears.
However, it does not only focus on these women who seem to be somewhat incomprehensible today.
It is more like standing in the long river of time and space, looking back and looking for those buried female histories.
Gao Yuanyuan appears in this film
If, let's change the perspective and look for "commonness".
will find that women of different eras seem to travel through time and space, with overlapping destinies.
Their plight back then is similar to the plight of women now.
For example, the issue of divorce.
Whether to leave or not to leave are completely different choices, but at the same time they have the same core - to protect their own rights and interests.
Why did Qin Xianglian sue the court so resolutely not to divorce?
Because, they have put in a lot of labor for the family, and their social status is attached to the small family.
And the husband can legally abandon them under the pretext of "broken relationship". After
, where should they go?
Under the employment environment and social and cultural atmosphere at that time, divorce is likely to cause them to fall into a more difficult situation.
Today, these women have disappeared into the dust and smoke of history.
Nowadays, women have more choices besides returning to their families, and society’s tolerance for marriage status has also increased.
Divorce is no longer a "life-destroying" disaster.
On the contrary, women choose to divorce independently and hope that divorce can be made faster.
And this is also out of consideration of their own rights and interests, because of the existence of the divorce cooling-off period, the disadvantaged party will face a more difficult situation.
Domestic violence, the transfer of property by the other party, malicious competition for custody rights...
Under the times, legal system, and steel-like changes, those wandering women are trying their best to make their voices heard.
Another example is the problem of foot binding.
Today, the wrappings under the feet have been torn off, but has this aesthetic domestication really disappeared?
Whether it is the so-called "white and thin", or Kardashian-style breasts and fat buttocks, these are far from healthy.
In order to gain aesthetic recognition, many women are willing to trade their health for a4 waist, right-angled shoulders, and manga legs...
This way of guiding women to self-harm through social and cultural pressure seems to be another form of " foot binding".
Footbound women know better than anyone the pain it causes.
But the deep-rooted feudal ethics "brainwashing package" has already penetrated into their bones and blood, and they cannot be separated without skinning and cramp.
Nowadays, more and more women have realized that the whole society is permeated with appearance-shaming.
Some dramas even use the banner of "sweet pets" to treat appearance humiliation as "flirting".
Many women don't want to continue to be trapped by appearance anxiety.
But having this kind of awakened female consciousness does not mean that they can isolate the aesthetic anxiety of the whole society.
Times are changing, but the cages that restrain women shown in documentaries have never disappeared.
Now, the topic of women has become a battlefield of public opinion that explodes at any point.
Compared to the endless quarrels and confrontations, this cold old film can make peoplemore sober.
The 20th century was turbulent enough, and the women in it wrote their own history amidst the drastic changes.
Innovation is bound to be accompanied by labor pains, but the wheels of women's progress will not change because of this.
The full text is over.
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