Recently, a topic rushed to the hot search—
"my country's women's lifetime childless rate is close to 10%"
In terms of demographics, the criterion for judging women's lifetime childlessness and unmarried is 50 years old.
is a simple number, bringing the topic of fertility to the forefront again. The data of
comes from 2020.
In contrast, in 2015, the lifetime childless rate of Chinese women was 6.1%.
rose 64% in just five years.
This survey also shows that the average age of first marriage and first childbirth of women across the country continues to be delayed, and more and more women of childbearing age continue to decline in their willingness to bear children.
Among them, the "post-90s" and "post-00s" who are the subjects of childbearing, the average number of children they plan to have is 1.54 and 1.48 .
Obviously, in this era, people's desire for childbirth generally decreases.
But for women, childbirth is much more than what the numbers make it out to be.
Moreover, whether should bring children into this world is a major event in everyone's life, and it shouldn't all be attributed to women . Taking this opportunity,
would like to use a domestic documentary to discuss with you today——
’s story about giving birth.
"Birth Chronicle"
This is a documentary about women's marriage and childbirth.
has a total of three episodes, and the Douban score is 8.4. Director
confronts three sensitive topics about women:
DINK, abortion, and egg freezing.
tried to break into taboos about fertility through interviews.
"A normal person would want a child"
just opened the video, this uncle came with a heavy hammer.
Its degree of hurt is comparable to the line in another documentary about female childbirth "Wonderful Eggs" -
"A woman who can't give birth to a child is a chicken that can't lay eggs."
The documentary chooses the form of street interviews topic, asking passers-by their views on the idea of "not having children". In just one minute,
presented a variety of opinions.
"I have to leave a root for my boyfriend"
"A woman must have at least one child"
"Have more than one, as long as one of them becomes a talent, you will be successful"
The 12 interviewed in the documentary Among the passers-by, only two people accepted Dink's point of view, thinking that passing on the family line is an outdated idea.
It is not difficult to see that, influenced by traditional concepts, society is indeed not very tolerant of DINK groups.
In real life, it is not uncommon to think that Dink is not a normal person , and the more ugly words are far worse than this.
In the final analysis, their reasons for rejecting DINK are nothing more than three themes:
Public opinion pressure, family inheritance, raising children to prevent old age.
Are these questions really important to people who insist on DINK?
In order to gain a deeper understanding of the thoughts of the DINK group, the director visited three groups of DINK groups from different classes.
DINK is a choice his class has to make.
has been married for 8 years, and the 48-year-old "Old Beijing" Lao Yang answered this way.
The cramped room is full of second-hand goods, and the poverty of life is obvious.
In his opinion, having a child means heavy financial pressure - diapers, school district housing, cram schools...
and he has no money.
himself has been neglected because of his low economic and social status, and he does not want his children to repeat the same mistakes.
Having children was one of the things he gave up.
Brother Chen, who loves to enjoy life, decided so.
With marriage and childbirth, many friends who had dreams and passions around them chose to give up the things they lovething.
They don't have the opportunity to stop and think about what other people and things in their lives mean to them. If
changes for the sake of the child, it will be a tragedy in his life.
's concern about reality is the reason for choosing DINK. This is what
, a couple who have been married for 7 years, said.
As parents, it is a heavy burden for the couple to keep their children safe from birth to adulthood.
Life is a difficult game, I have already lived such a difficult life, why should I let my children participate.
Give birth to a child, no matter from the spiritual level or the material level, it will bring a lot of pressure to the family.
has nothing to do with age or gender, the core appeal of their choice of DINK is focused on one thing -
's own life is the priority.
Everyone should have the right to choose their life.
If you focus on women, the answer turns to another level—
the pain of childbirth.
Screaming wailing, without a drop of blood, but full of bloody feeling...
This is the performance of a drama in Beijing, telling the birth experience of a rural woman in the 1990s.
gave birth twice and induced labor three times.
is cruel, but it is something that every woman may face.
The drama actors are a group of female workers in urban villages, and the drama presents their real lives.
said above, is just physical pain .
There are many traumatic experiences women face during childbirth.
But in social issues, these are all suppressed. The
documentary presents these intimate topics to the public by interviewing the creators of the play.
For example, the psychological trauma of childbirth .
On the one hand, the husband is often absent during the birth process. Most of the women in the
documentary present a state of being sad but understandable.
After all, it is impossible to stop working and living just to let him accompany you.
On the other hand, we often ignore the pain of those who choose to have a miscarriage, or a failed delivery .
Whether active or passive, the pain of losing a child is ultimately a lifetime trauma for women.
What's more cruel is that many women had no choice at the time.
Fertility problems are a reflection of a woman's life situation. While
praises the greatness of "life", it is also necessary to look directly at the cruelty of "life".
In all fairness, how many people can really stick to DINK?
The woman in the "DINK Couple" also frankly stated in the interview that she is not sure about her future thoughts.
"Then if I retire, what should I do if I really have nothing to do?"
It can be seen that she is still hesitant about not having children.
She has even considered another possibility of having children, freezing her eggs.
In order to let the audience better understand the matter of freezing eggs. The
documentary interviewed two "marriable women" who chose to freeze their eggs, trying to use their experiences to uncover the mystery of egg freezing.
Abu , a 32-year-old documentary editor.
Guo Lei , a self-media expert.
The same thing is, they all once fantasized about having children before the age of 30.
But having a baby is not a matter for one person, they have to find a "partner".
As time goes by, they gradually realize that
finding a partner is very difficult,
giving birth is even more difficult
but fortunately with the development of assisted reproductive medicine
human beings can achieve this More autonomy
That's how they started incorporating egg freezing into their life plans.
As "the only regret medicine in the world", freezing eggs is not an easy task.
First of all, the domestic egg freezing policy is strict.
Although as early as more than ten years ago, egg freezing surgery was already available in China.
But the problem is, it's only open to married women.
Moreover, only fertilized eggs can be frozen.
For single women, they have to deal with age.
Deterioration of body function and decline of ovarian function, whether to have a child or freeze eggs, they must make a choice as soon as possible.
Under the condition that the policy does not change, they can only choose to transnationally freeze their eggs.
Secondly, parents and partners are not supportive.
Abu, whose mother died young, was raised by his father since childhood. When
learned that Abu decided to go to the United States to freeze his eggs, his relatives and friends agreed, hoping that Abu would give birth naturally .
Some friends even said—
“The country encourages young people to have bold ideas, which is not what you think.”
However, Abu’s father, as the most critical part of it, chose to remain silent in response to .
In the opinion of his father, many decisions in Abu's life were too sudden.
Including the decision to freeze eggs, even if the mother is alive, I am afraid she will not accept it.
is different from Abu, Guo Lei's burden comes from her boyfriend .
When Guo Lei expressed her intention to freeze her eggs to her boyfriend, the attitude of the man seemed to have nothing to do with himself.
If intimacy cannot be relied upon, then the pressure of making choices can only be borne alone.
Finally, the psychological fear of surgery. The moment
and the two arrived in the United States, the frozen eggs had a real feeling. Before the
operation, a series of physical examinations need to be done repeatedly to determine whether the ovaries meet the requirements and whether the body functions can cope with the operation.
The lens is aimed at the B-ultrasound screen, and the doctor explains the egg retrieval operation to the two in a gentle tone—
These black dots are the follicle (within) fluid, which contains an egg
When your follicle grows to 18mm
We'll give you an egg-breaking needle operation
Any woman who hears this is probably going to shudder.
's long stream-of-consciousness shot, the cello music is mixed with the beeping of the heartbeat monitor.
Whether it is the picture or the music, it brings a strong sense of discomfort to the audience.
Guo Lei narrated her dream before the operation in the form of narration—
I dreamed about how this operation was done, do you know how
is to pull the two sides of the person apart like this, and then tear the skin
and then I asked the doctor how to put it back after the skin was torn off
The doctor said that it will be stitched with stitches
So the person who has taken the eggs can see two scars on the side of the neck
with incisions on both sides
At the beach, the two discussed when the egg might be used.
Guo Lei said that even though her eggs have been frozen now, she still feels the most relaxed are those who have already given birth to children.
The seemingly cool Abu also said that becoming a mother is both scary and tempting to him.
chose the plan B of egg freezing, just to give life another choice.
But this choice is not easy.
Maternity is still a bondage for them.
Low birth rate is not only a problem for China.
As early as 2018, South Korea's total fertility rate (referring to the average number of children per couple) was only 0.98.
has become the only country in the world whose fertility rate has entered the "zero era". According to
statistics, if South Korea’s fertility rate continues to follow this trend, then from 2031, the total population of South Korea will begin to decline.
Meanwhile, a new protest movement has taken hold among young South Koreans—
boycotting the census' use of the term "unmarried."
unmarried in their opinionIt represents a transitional state, and the ultimate form is still marriage.
And in their hearts, life is not only these two choices.
Compared to unmarried, they prefer to use "unmarried" to refer to themselves. The state represented by
"unmarried" has nothing to do with time.
(Jung Se-young and Baker Hana, advocates of "non-married life" in South Korea)
On the other hand, Japan, which is aging seriously, also faces severe fertility problems .
The Japanese government uses appropriate fiscal policies to encourage people to have children, but in terms of results, it still has little effect.
It cannot be denied that life is a miracle.
But in the context of the global economic downturn, no matter in any country, raising children is undoubtedly a burden.
Nowadays, my country's fertility rate has become the lowest in the world. The social problems reflected by
are not as simple as the desire to have children.
The ten countries or regions with the lowest fertility rates in the world
The data comes from the report "World Population Prospects 2022" released by the United Nations.
At work, young people must face fancy introversion.
Life, but also face the pressure of expensive housing.
can't lie flat, can't roll up.
My life is already exhausted, how can I even think about talking about fertility?
In public opinion, still has many voices pointing the finger at women .
It seems that women's reluctance to have children is the root cause of this problem.
In fact, "life" is just the beginning of everything.
More importantly, "education".
"Procreation" means responsibility, a responsibility that cannot be escaped once the decision is made.
However, many people cannot take on such responsibilities.
is just like Guo Lei's boyfriend mentioned in the film.
As the date of the egg freezing operation approached, Guo Lei's boyfriend proposed to break up. What is the reason for
breaking up?
Boyfriend thinks Guo Lei is a little boy, but he wants to find a little girl. Is
really so?
Although Guo Lei did not explicitly say that she wanted to get married and have children, the possibility existed from the moment she decided to freeze her eggs.
This possibility makes her boyfriend fearful.
In the controversial "Jin Zhiying Born in 1982" in South Korea, after working as a full-time housewife for two years, Jin Zhiying suffered from parenting depression and schizophrenia.
Endless chores, non-stop parenting.
It is very rare that when you go out with your children, you will be ridiculed by the office workers you meet by chance"Mom bug". In Korean,
refers to lazy people who do not work because they have children and rely on their husbands to support them.
full-time wife, a title that sounds flattering. The dedication behind the title
is far beyond imagination.
Not to mention, there are still many single mothers in society.
The life of most single mothers is far more difficult than imagined.
In 2020, the Guangzhou Women's Federation once released a survey report on the living conditions of single mothers across the country. According to the
report, nearly 80% of single mothers cannot get enough alimony from their ex-spouse and need to face periodic or continuous financial pressure.
At the same time, it is common for single mothers to face discrimination in the workplace and in the marriage market.
Compared with exerting pressure from public opinion, simply increasing the fertility rate requires the society to pay attention to these details and continuously improve corresponding policies and welfare systems.
More importantly, learn to listen to women's voices, respect everyone's choices, and work together to create a more inclusive social environment.
After all, the most important thing in life is never just about childbirth.
In a relatively free environment, having the right to choose life is the goal we pursue.
The full text is over.
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