The funeral home cured my "shame of the weak" | Drama Review of "Sanyue Has a New Job"

When it comes to death, we always feel very heavy and mysterious, what is after death? Sanyue's aunt said that death was a dark corridor, which made Sanyue not aware of it, but she was suspicious. Let’s understand from another angle here, what death is, death is the loss of autonomy, and death means a sense of powerlessness. In the face of the crying relatives around us and the work that we have not completed, we even said a word of comfort, touching Touching their heads and typing out a line of words, such an ordinary thing, can no longer be done, death is the extreme of frailty, so, returning to the funeral home, the bodies, of course, lost their lives and could not be resurrected from the dead. It seems that they do not belong to our living world, but if we return to the real situation, that they are in our world and they are not in other worlds, then the remains, the dead, are only extreme symbols of the weak, and they are He was so weak that he didn't even have the ability to dress himself or comb his hair, so he could only be at the mercy of others. The essence of the dead was actually the weakest. Think about those words that are often used to insult the weak, such as "waste" and "dead pig." Isn't the essence of these words denying the weak as a human being, as a living human being? The dead are the extreme form of the weak.

Second, asthenia phobia

realizes this, understanding death from the perspective of life, we can re-understand why Zhao Sanyue wants to die, why so many young people often say that they don't want to live, and often want to die intermittently .

The reason why Zhao Sanyue sat on the bridge and had the idea of ​​committing suicide was because he was denied again and again, and one was denied by the society. Sanyue studied art-related majors and went to the counterpart unit for an interview after graduation. , but the other party rejected Sanyue on the grounds of "wanting a boy more". That is to say, from the perspective of that unit, the value of female graduates is not as good as that of male graduates. The other was denied by her family. Sanyue's biological parents divorced very early, and her father cheated. So the mother vented all her grievances to the child. When venting parents vent their emotions to their children, in fact, they do not regard the child as a human being at all. He has no dignity. What is a "punching bag"? Punching bag means that he is not considered human at all.

So, why does Sanyue not want to live anymore, because he feels that he is worthless, that his life has no meaning, why does Sanyue feel that he is worthless and meaningless, because Sanyue realizes that he is a loser, a loser, yes A weak person can't compete with others for work, and his family can't compete with stepfather. He is a waste, a useless person. According to many people's ideas, waste should be thrown into the trash can, and useless people should die. This is Sanyue's logic of wanting to die. Even though she may not really want to jump off the bridge, he is clearly aware of the requirement of this "death logic". Saying "In this world, why can't people who want to work work and those who want to lie down lie down? Although we don't contribute much to society, we don't do any harm." "Death" is arguing with people who actually keep underestimating "you are so useless, you should die" in our ears.

This is the "humiliation of the weak" that exists widely in our society, that is, not treating the weak as human beings, and even directly thinking that the weak are not human and deserve to die.

And when the humiliation of the weak becomes a wide range of social behavior and social psychology, it will of course be internalized as a way of judging the self, that is, a "shame of the weak" is formed in our hearts, that is, the weak seem guilty. , is morally unclean, if I am weak, it must be my fault, I am shameless, even shameless to live. This "shame of the weak" facing others and the "shame of the weak" in the heart together form a "phobia" that we may not be aware of. The social "phobia" is that we use various In such a name, such as in the name of health, safety and even morality, avoid contact with the weak. For example, when people see mental patients and beggars, they will automatically stay away. Is it really self-protection in rational calculation? Or is it first of all disgust and disgust, feeling unlucky? The so-called bad luck is the fear of being unlucky and becoming weak. Well, let's think about it, the funeral home workers, in the play, theyIn fact, I am in a similar situation. Because I work in a funeral home and deal with extremely weak people like the dead, I can't rent a house, I can't get a taxi, and I'm also disgusted by people for eating. Why, this logic is also the same, in fact, it is It is believed that one must stay away from the weak to avoid bad luck and become weak. Not to mention, then, how terrified we are of being the weak, the loser. In simple terms, frailty is two sentences: if others are weak, stay away from him, and if you are weak, isolate yourself, or even die to isolate yourself by death. Fear of weakness and admiration for the strong are a common social psychology. And because of this kind of psychology, in the play, if it wasn't for being coaxed and deceived by the aunt, Sanyue would never have gone to work in the funeral home.

3. Staying at home is the instinct of survival

So, let's go back and think about why Sanyue stayed at home for more than a year and didn't go out to work? Is it really because of laziness? The aunt told him the truth when she introduced him to her job. Sanyue was afraid of being rejected again and denied again. If she was identified again, it would eventually prove to be a real waste. Then, in Sanyue’s opinion at that time, I really should die. The core of this is "shame for the weak", which is frailty. So, when Sanyue sat on the overpass, some people said that it was the coquettish anger of young people. I really feel that saying this He is arrogant and ignorant except for his age. Sanyue might not really jump off the bridge at that time, especially when the aunt who knows he loves him appears, he will jump off the bridge, but, What would Sanyue do if the motherfucker appeared and mocked her with her self-righteous, self-righteous, self-seeking face again? What is the subtext of that mockery? Is: Just like you, you dare to commit suicide? It's eight words: nothing is good, and there is nothing wrong with death. Because, nothing is worth it, so, there is nothing left to die for. In Sanyue at that time, under a series of social education and family education, she deeply agreed with this point, so she understood such a kind of "humiliation of the weak", such a social "frailty", we can understand why Sanyue has to be a waste house for a year, because to avoid the evaluation of the society is to avoid the negation of the value of self-existence, to beg for mercy and stay at home for the sake of living. , is a kind of survival instinct.

But, looking back, we might as well think, why is it "worthless" when "dead is worthless"? Why should the weak be denied the value of life? Why should useless people die? What's more, what is useless? Is Zhao Sanyue really useless? When Zhao Sanyue first arrived at the funeral home, she didn't even go through the reporting procedures. She used her knowledge of stage art to become famous in the first battle. Using lighting effects, the collapsed nose bridge of the deceased was as straight as before, comforting the parents of the deceased. Zhao Sanyue has his inexhaustible usefulness, and everyone has his inexhaustible usefulness. The real problem is that some people are defining what is useful and what is useless. For example, the mother of Zhao Sanyue in the early days felt that there must be a decent Only work is useful, and everything else is useless. For example, Auntie Shandong thinks that her son-in-law must be a civil servant to be useful, otherwise how much money you earn will be useless.

Therefore, the weak, of course, it is best to be able to work hard, but there are many reasons for the weak to become weak, and sometimes the inability to do anything is not simply because of their own reasons, but may be a lack of suitable opportunities like Sanyue. , or because of the irresistible catastrophe of disease, equating weakness with laziness, and even directly characterizing it as moral corruption and humiliation, which can be said to be both ignorant and arrogant.

Fourth, the weakest can be strong

So back to Sanyue, how did Zhao Sanyue die in the funeral home? It's because the funeral home cured Zhao Sanyue's "frailty" and her "weak shame".

The key to frailty or the shame of the weak is to equate strength and weakness with value. Then, death, as the weakest human being, is simply a certainty, and there is no doubt that it has no value.

However, in the play there are people who have passed away, but they can be full of value and even power. For example, at the end of the play, Yanan, an elderly woman who is pregnant, is shocked and inspired by knowing that a brain-dead pregnant woman gave birth to a newborn. , so she also felt that she should give birth to her own child, and she regarded the deceased as her and her child's benefactor.

and offRegarding the power of the deceased, the most shocking story may be the comfort woman Liu Meilan. She said in her suicide note that she would expose her body to let people see how cruel and shameless the invaders were. At the end of this story, there are many Citizens spontaneously came to pay their respects to the remains.

is, old people, women, dead people, people who have been violated by countless people but have no power to fight back and suffered humiliation, those people who are considered to be the weakest in the world, but there are such surging, raging and fierce people. strength.

This incident has no value to Zhao Sanyue's concept of being weak and equal, and the challenge of the weak being ashamed should be shocking. Even we can clearly feel the power given by the deceased Liu Meilan to Zhao Sanyue. He finally dared to be in the circle of friends Openly work in a funeral home. The tree burial , which is highly praised in the

film, has repeatedly grown new seedlings in the soil buried with ashes. In fact, they all imply that the weakest deceased also has the power to regenerate life and its unexpected value. .

5. The weak is the antonym of possession

However, simply telling the power of the deceased and the meaning of the deceased to the living is not enough to cure Zhao Sanyue's shame of the weak, because the story of the comfort woman Liu Meilan is rare, and she still insists on brain death The mother who arrives at the birth of the child is also an extremely rare case. Even a similar story is actually an explanatory framework that equates strength and weakness with value. That is, the deceased is still fierce and powerful, so it is still of great value. The real cure for Sanyue was actually related to a major trauma and confusion she encountered in the funeral home, which was Director Gao's death.

The senior executive is a likeable person. He has a calm nature, attaches great importance to love and righteousness, and has no fatherly taste. Zhao Sanyue has deep feelings for him. In a sense, for Zhao Sanyue, whose father is absent, Director Gao is actually like his father. The departure of Director Gao brought great confusion to Zhao Sanyue. He complained to Zhou Yanan that since life is a separation and a person after all, then why do you want me to know you? What's the point of wasting time on people and things to say goodbye after all? Why not let him continue to be mourned? Then Zhao Sanyue resigned.

In fact, Zhao Sanyue also expressed the same doubts before. After Liu Meilan's memorial service, Luo Damiao, the ambiguous object at the time, said that the funeral home was like a park. Zhao Sanyue said that the world is also a big park, but what is the purpose of life? ? Are you going to take everything from the park? But after death, he can't take anything with him. Therefore, Zhao Sanyue said that he was particularly afraid of death, because he felt that there was a huge emptiness behind death, which seemed to have no meaning at all.

I think this is also the biggest confusion that death brings us, that is, since the success and failure are turned around, what's the point of me doing all this? Why don't I just lie down?

There is actually a key word here, which is "take away", because nothing can be taken away, so it feels like death is a void, then, on the other hand, does it mean that if you can take something away, there is something behind death. Pretty real, not confusing, not scary anymore?

take away what? The essence of taking away is possession, so there is another equal sign here, that is, possession equals meaning, and the significance of our life depends on how much we possess. This is why the weak is considered meaningless, because the weak is the opposite of "possession", "loser", loser, and loser literally means loser. Most of the time, why don't we think like this: the strong are the possessors, and the weak are the losers.

6. The essence of "shame of the weak" is "occupational obsession"

Of course this does not deny the value of possession, otherwise it encourages everyone to become a monk. The real problem here is that possession is regarded as the only valuable thing in life. It is a kind of "occupational obsession". Because if we regard possession as the only thing of value in life, then the only thing we need to do in this life is to constantly accumulate and pile up on ourselves, and build ourselves into an eternal and immortal huge subject that combines all things, all people, This world is regarded as the object of possession. Men are used to be horses, women are to give birth to children, and the world is to be used to compete. In fact, whether it is shame for the weak or worship for the strong, in fact, they will occupyThere is only one value in life. If you possess more, you should be proud of it. If you possess less, you will naturally be ashamed.

The world is for the deer, which seems very exciting, but behind such a concept is a huge void, because if you understand the value of life in this way, then, of course, death is extremely terrifying. Because, in the end, no one can own even a little bit, who doesn't come and go naked? Therefore, our fear of death, in addition to the pain and unknown of death itself, has another additional fear, that is, the fear of failure, that is, everything is right and wrong, and in the end it is neither right or wrong, nor is it divided or defeated. This is simply fatal, if so, then this life is not in vain. This is actually the reason why Zhao Sanyue felt lost and confused about death, and also the reason why she resigned. That is, since life has no value after all, what am I still struggling with, what do I need my own personality and my own subject to do? Therefore, Zhao Sanyue stopped struggling. After resigning, he went to work in his mother's bridal shop and listened to his mother's arrangement of his life.

This kind of concept of possession as the only value, this kind of "occupational obsession", his essence actually regards himself as the only subject, and regards others, whether it is objects or people, as objects of possession , regarded as the object, the subject is the strong, and the object is the weak, so behind the worship of the strong and the shame of the weak, what is more essential is a kind of egocentrism, it just means that the shame of the weak is for oneself There is no shame for being the center of the universe, but the cognition behind this shame is still that you should be the center of the universe, so this kind of egocentrism goes down, in fact, it is the belief that in this world, only oneself is valuable Yes, other people and other things are all raw materials used to increase their own value, and none of them have their original value. When Zhao Sanyue failed to turn into a normal person for the first time, he actually thought about it like this. He said that he now puts makeup on the deceased person, practice makes perfect, faster than applying a mask himself, and he hopes to challenge the more difficult body restoration work in the future. In fact, this is completely treating the deceased as an object of operation, rather than a once alive, independent and dignified person.

Seven. Possession and experience

Of course, when it comes to possession, in addition to possession being the only source of value, another thing that deserves our attention is that the key to possession is not simply possession itself, because who lives without possessing something? Picking up a stone is also possession. The key to possession is to possess more than others. The so-called weak are actually those who possess less than others, while the dead have lost any ability to possess and become the ultimate weak. And under such logic, there is no absolute powerhouse, and there is no standard to say that life is full of meaning after you reach it, not to say that if you have 100 stones, your life will be full of meaning. In front of someone with 101 stones, you are nothing. We often say "he has a lot", which is actually a comparison in itself, that is, "he has significantly more than the average person". Therefore, to measure the meaning of life by possession, it seems that we regard ourselves as the subject and the controller, but, in comparison, we actually judge the meaning of our life through others, those who are well-known or unknown. , inexplicably become the determinants of the value of our life, in fact, we have become passive, become the actual object. So, in fact, when you regard others as something that needs to be possessed, you yourself become something that needs to be compared, and equating possession with meaning is actually alienating all life into objects.

Here we say possession, not to deny the meaning of possession, but to say that there are indeed many things in life that we cannot possess. The bright moon in between" is "me and my son are comfortable", who can possess the sun and the moon? Back in the play, can Zhao Sanyue or Luo Damiao possess each other? At least Zhao Sanyue won't allow this kind of thing. He refuses to be ambiguous, that is, to refuse to be controlled and refuse to be possessed. Good love can only happen between two independent individuals. What is even more touching is that Tao Liqing's love for Director Gao, when Director Gao's life is about to wither, his wife Tao Liqing invited Director Gao's first love girlfriend, who is also Sanyue'sAuntie, to fulfill the wish of Director Gao and Aunt March to dance a tango , he said "love is more important than the ending", which is actually saying, "true love, not possession", and the one I said at the beginning The connotation of Xiao Sichuan's confession to Liang Gege is the same. And Sanyue, who finally got out of the shame of the weak and regained a new belief in life, also said the sentence "Death is not terrible, but it is terrible to miss the scenery" "The meaning of life is not only possession, but also experience.

8. Treating the dead is not just to comfort the living

The essence of shame for the weak is the obsession with possession, egocentrism and the objectification of the other. Then, after the death of Curator Gao, how did Zhao Sanyue come from How can the confusion and emptiness brought by the shame of the weak get out of the frailty?

Zhao Sanyue returned to work at the funeral parlour. In terms of the plot, it was because of the guests he personally participated in the wedding preparations that a serious car accident occurred and there were countless deaths, which became a major event in the city. Zhao Sanyue was called back to the funeral parlour to help make up the body. Zhao Sanyue was the first This time, I felt these bodies that he was going to repair in such a personal and profound way. They were originally living people who were going to participate in a joyous event. As the others of the remains, these were often shown as immobile in the funeral home. The existence of , finally here in Sanyue, is connected with the subject with vitality, self-consciousness, independent personality and dignity: the dead are also human beings.

Of course, the reason why Sanyue was able to completely cure his frailty is more fundamentally because of her long-term nurturing in the funeral home, the place where the weakest gather, because in the dead place of the funeral home, she has re-enriched the existence of people, understanding of life.

We often think that treating the deceased well is to comfort the living, but this drama goes beyond this oversimplified logic. In the drama, the orphans who no one cares about, the deceased elderly who don't care about children, three Yue's master, Lao Liu, has to tidy them up quickly, dress them well at his own expense, and let them leave with dignity. There are no relatives of the deceased here to comfort them. So, what kind of belief is being expressed here? That is, as a human being, even if he is so weak to the point of a dead person that he has lost any ability to maintain his dignity, he is still an individual, with the innate and unquestionable dignity of human beings, and should be treated as a human being. They should be treated, not because of the stronger or the vassal of the living, for example, because of whose parents or children, they need to be treated kindly.

is in the funeral home of this drama. Of course, the difference between strong and weak exists, and the boundaries between life and death are naturally clear, but human dignity, whether it is the living or the dead, is the same. In the world of No. 998 Xingfu Road, as a make-up artist of the living, in front of the body of the deceased, he is not someone who can do whatever he wants because he is alive, and take it for granted that he is at the center. On the contrary, the master Lao Liu has been following Sanyue emphasized that the deceased was the teacher of the makeup artist. At the end of each makeup, the makeup artist would bow respectfully to the deceased.

However, this kind of undifferentiated respect, this kind of humanistic spirit is not some kind of self-moving wishful thinking. From the perspective of society as a whole, these weakest people are the soft underbelly of those strong ones, because there is no permanent in the world. The difference between the strong and the weak is never static. All the strong will eventually become weak, will become old, and will reach a situation where they have to be at the mercy of others. Giving dignity to the weak and the dead is actually a guarantee of the dignity of the strong. And this is not simply some vulgar functionalist calculation, but tells a truth about human existence, that is, we exist not only in ourselves, but also in others, that I, only beyond me , can become a human being. The final story of this drama is that a pair of parents donated the organs of Xiaobin, a child with leukemia, to other people. Xiaobin helped them continue their lives, and his own value was also enhanced. He became him The warrior in his heart, and his parents opened a shared kitchen next to the hospital for the family members of the patients to make low-cost meals, helping others and supporting themselves. The tree burial that the funeral home respected, the ashes of the burial raised saplings , is also talking about the same problem, our life can not only grow, but also grow in the lives of others. The most daily manifestation of this is the joy of helping others, because making othersBenefit and feel happy, doesn't this mean that we also grow on others?

Nine, Zhao Sanyue's life to death

In this drama, Sanyue's last and most important story is that when his biological father was dying, he touched his hand. It was the hand of a person who was considered to be unavoidable. In the end, Sanyue corrected her father's remains as he did with all the dead. That is to say, although Sanyue may not have forgiven it, However, he tried his best to respect the immobile body of a person who was full of strong emotions, loved to live, and hated to die. This was Sanyue's graduation ceremony in the funeral home, and it was Zhao Sanyue's freshman. ceremony.

why do you say that? Because, in this world, intense love can easily make people dwarf themselves into objects and edges, while intense hatred can easily make people elevate themselves into the only subject and center. A person, as respectful as everyone, Sanyue confirms her position full of dignity and self-confidence. This position has never been the center of the universe and is definitely not someone's edge. That is where Sanyue stands, grows, has The place of life, here, Sanyue finally completed her life to death, she learned to respect, but also has self-esteem.

That's it, Sanyue has a new job, and Sanyue has a new life. Our Sanyue finally got out of the idea that self-isolation is actually self-centeredness, and also out of the shame of the weak, the so-called shame of the weak, Its essence is the shame of not being in the center. The experience of the funeral home just tells Sanyue that no one is at the center for granted, and even in this world, there is no absolute center. Everyone's life has its own dignity that cannot be rated or ranked. It is not a so-called more The edge and vassal of the strong. Therefore, if you are not in a center that cannot exist at all, there is nothing to be ashamed of, and it cannot be a basis for judging whether a person's life is worthwhile. What's more, a person, whether strong or weak, has his own The value of human beings, the natural dignity, does not need to be given or judged by anyone.

In the first episode of this drama, the dead Qin Wei exclaimed in a letter left to the half-dead Sanyue that "it's good to be alive", some people may think that this is just wishful thinking, but , I think the real problem is not how good life is, but that we don't need to use things like "shame of the weak" and "worship of the strong" to add extra pain to us and make our lives unnecessarily Bad, alive, at least it can be good.

and the so-called "right and wrong turn one's head empty" means that in the end, there is no difference between success and failure, success or failure is empty, but success or failure is empty, it does not mean that life is empty.

At the end of the day, what does it feel like to live? Whether it is empty or not, we should feel it ourselves. We have five senses and six senses. That, why should we judge the value of our own life through others, and let others make irresponsible remarks and point fingers?