"The First Incense": Women, never betray yourself for love

text | Flowing position · anchor | Yaxuan

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"I love you, what does it matter to you? You can't be blamed on you."

is a famous saying about love, even if nothing People who have read Zhang Ailing must have also heard of it. The words

were said by a girl named Ge Weilong in Zhang Ailing's work "The First Incense". When

heard it when she was young, she felt that the woman who could say it was arrogant and brave in the face of love, which made people admire and admire. When

was in middle age, I read Zhang Ailing again and witnessed the circumstances under which the girl said this sentence and how it ended, but my feelings were completely different from when I was young.

is degenerate, and at the beginning of the

story unknowingly, Ge Weilong is just an ordinary Shanghai girl.

Due to the war, she followed her family and fled from Shanghai to another place. In order to continue his studies, Weilong decided to seek refuge in his widowed and rich aunt Mrs. Liang.

Mrs. Liang did not hesitate to break with her family when she was young. She became the wife of a wealthy businessman in the fourth house. When the rich husband died, she was given a lot of money. Now she is the "Queen Empress Dowager Cixi" of Liang's residence, living a arrogant and prosperous life. life.

Weilong has always heard that her aunt’s reputation outside is “not very clean”, but the young woman thinks that when others say what others say, I can only be myself. When I meet someone who really likes me in the future, the other party won’t mind. And believe in those rumors.

However, young people tend to underestimate the influence and erosion of this materialistic society on them.

On the first night of staying in her aunt’s house, when Weilong opened the closet, she saw rows of brand-new Chinese clothes, golden and brilliant:

"homely brocade robe, silk, soft satin, short coat, long coat , The cloak, pajamas, bathrobes, evening gowns, afternoon gowns for drinking cocktails, semi-formal dinner gowns for meeting guests at home, all colors and colors."

A female student who has never been involved in the world could not resist the temptation. , Pandora's Box of Desire, once opened, it is difficult to close.

In just two or three months, Wei Long, who thought he could stick to his principles, gradually became addicted to the luxury life of a drunken gold fan.

The love of a person, only you are touched

Once the prey enters the trap, there is no reason for the hunter to let it go. Mrs. Liang "captured" Weilong with gorgeous clothes, exquisite jewelry, and luxurious life, and gradually "domesticated" her.

Weilong became a bait for her aunt to attract young talents. Later, Mrs. Liang even tried to push Weilong to her old lover.

Weilong, who is in deep trouble, met the swinger Qiao Qiqiao at the garden party held by his aunt, and then fell in love with this man like moths.

But, a playboy like Qiao Qiqiao loves no one except himself. When Weilong just expressed her heart and wanted to "entrust" herself to Qiao Qiqiao, Qiao Qiqiao said to her very bluntly, I can't give you anything except happiness, let alone promise the marriage you want. .

After this conversation, it is clear that Qiao Qiqiao is not a good person, and Weilong still has a relationship with him.

But she finally underestimated the degree of Qiao Qiqiao's "scum". Just after coming out of Weilong's room, Qiao Qiqiao turned her head to seduce the maid of Mrs. Liang's house, and Weilong who is still immersed in love fantasy Happened to witness this scene. The story of

has developed here. From the perspective of most women, there is no other choice or ending besides breaking up with this scumbag.

Ke Weilong is like many young girls. Once in love, he can't call himself.

once said in a TV series: "As long as a woman falls in love, she becomes unreasonable, or she clings to this love and loses herself. "

Weilong, who was stunned by love, beats the maid. Once, I was seriously ill and struggled a few times, but after all I couldn't get started with Qiao Qiqiao.

In the end, under the "guidance" of her aunt, Weilong "successfully" married Qiao Qiqiao, voluntarily betrayed her hue to "make money to support her family", and became a social flower for her aunt and money for Qiao Qiqiao.

is a silly girl who is obsessed with love, even if Qiao Qiqiao is too lazy to say a little lie that makes her happy, she still stubbornly said the phrase "I love you, what does it matter to you? There are so many weird things. I can't blame you."

betrayed himself, not in exchange for love

Plato once said: "The most regrettable thing in life is to easily give up what should not be given up, and stubbornly insist on what should not be insisted on."

From the perspective of others, Weilong married Qiao Qiqiao unhesitatingly, and even fell for the man who didn't love him. She insisted on the love that shouldn't be insisted. Is it really worth it?

Our others are worthless for Weilong, but she herself is willing. Because young people don’t think about “worth”, they only think about “love or not”.

Young love is always determined with moths to the fire, willing to fight for that person, give up everything, even not even myself.

In that era of wars and most women still need to rely on men to survive, maybe Weilong has a choice she has to choose.

But I still think that no matter in any era, it is difficult for a person who has even given up on himself to get love, and only a silly girl who is not sensible will treat a man as everything to him.

is like what the writer Zhang Xiaoxian said:

"There is no love worthy of losing yourself for. If you don’t have yourself, what else can you use to love and be loved? If there is only love without yourself, it is humble You will eventually lose the love without yourself. "

, relying on everyone to run, or relying on yourself is the best

The love of recklessness and moths to the fire often ends up just in the mirror. Especially for women who have lost themselves, the consequences are devastating.

not only lost love and self, but eventually lost even the basic ability to gain a foothold in life.

"The First Half of My Life" once said: "No one will become what you think, a safe haven for this life and this life, only you are your last refuge. "

So, a girl does not matter At all times, you should strive to have material and spiritual independence. This ability allows you to have the right to choose, and allows you to live freely without pleasing or dependent on anyone.

Don't put your chances of happiness on others. A person who doesn't love you, even if you love it so humble, not loving is not loving. An independent woman will never beg for love from a man.

They fantasize about love, look forward to love, and embrace love enthusiastically.

But the bottom line is, never sell yourself for love. Without love, they will still have themselves, and they still have the ability to support life.

After all, mature and reasonable women know that: is the best way to rely on the mountains and mountains to run.

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