Text: Lu Qiuyuan (Bachelor of Finance and Taxation, National Chengchi University, Master of Soochow Law, Ph.D., National Taiwan University, Ph.D., London School of Economics and Political Science, post-doctoral research. Current head of Mida Economic and Trade Law Office, member of Taipei Municipal Commission of Integrity, News 98 Radio "Nine Eight Host of Law Firm. Good at telling stories that are full of human experience behind legal cases.)
(Photo by @Tuncay @ flickr)
The author of this article, Lu Qiuyuan, is a lawyer, good at telling stories. In this way, the precious human nature and interesting experience beyond the right and wrong of good and evil are presented behind legal cases.
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dear aunt, although you are me Mother, but let me call you aunt.
You and your daughter-in-law met in the court, and it is not your son that needs to be reviewed most, but you.
I don’t know if you still remember how your mother-in-law treated you thirty years ago when you first married into this home. You may have forgotten it, but let me remind you that this is not the time when wives-in-law became wives for many years. You can’t copy your experience to your daughter-in-law, because now even your grandson’s last name doesn’t necessarily match your son. What else can you insist on?
If your son wants to remarry again, there are a few things that I can remind you that he will not come to court again, otherwise he will be embarrassed when he meets me again.
Please do not insist on living with your son and daughter-in-law, it is best to drive them out. Even if they can only rent houses, that is their business. The beauty of the long distance guarantees a good relationship between your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
Don't treat your daughter-in-law as your daughter, just treat her as your son's wife, your friend, and that's fine. You can treat your son as a minor forever, but please treat your wife as a peer with respect. You scold her and she will remember it for a lifetime. In this world, only her mother can care about her, and her mother is not you.
Your daughter-in-law buys things randomly, likes watching Korean dramas, likes to slide her phone, doesn’t wash clothes and cooks, has bad hygiene habits, doesn’t like tidying up the house, doesn’t bring children, etc. The bad habits are not your business. The matter between your son and her, and your son's matter is not your business, he has really grown up.
If you live together, please respect each other. Don't touch their husband and wife's things, don't help them wash clothes and cook, don't help them with their grandchildren. Unless your daughter-in-law asks you, and you are willing to help if you can, just think about it. Take care of their affairs yourself, don't bother you.
Their husband and wife quarrel, please pretend not to hear. You quarreled with your husband. Would you like your mother-in-law to intervene? If you don’t want it, wouldn’t it be weird for you to step in now? When the son complained, he would say good things to his wife and forget them immediately. As for the wife’s complaint, then scold your son a few more words.
Your grandson’s parents are your son and daughter-in-law, not your husband and you. Inter-generational education is not ideal. Try to let them take care of the children by themselves, especially not depriving the wife of the right to raise the children. How can they not be used to it, the consequences are also for them.
Daughter-in-law does not need to be filial to you. It is your son who should be filial to you. Please train your son to become a responsible man and help you get along with your daughter-in-law. Your wife's kindness to you should always be on your lips, and your wife's kindness should be forgotten immediately.
When your son is discussing divorce in court, please don't come. This will make him look a lot like Mabao, and you can't enter the mediation room and courtroom, so you can only be anxious outside.
plan your retirement life more, don't focus on your sons and daughters, even if your life is over halfway, there are many interesting and new things to learn. It is your task to make your old life more brilliant. Please spend all your property before you die, and don't let your property become inheritance.
grandson is not yours, but his parents' baby, please automatically recite it three times.
Dear aunt, being a good mother is not easy, but being a good mother-in-law is easy. The simple formula is: "Look and ignore, hear and not hear". You can care more about your own life instead of your son and daughter-in-law. I believe in your life.It will be better. To be honest, children and grandchildren have their own children and grandchildren, and it is important to take care of themselves.
★This article is excerpted from the Facebook of Lawyer Lu Qiuyuan. Reprinting of
is prohibited without permission.
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