balances the relationship between Dabao and Erbao has become a problem for many second-child families.
Is a bowl of water really flat?
Some time ago, Qin Hao imitated Wang Xiaofei's completely different attitudes towards two children in the show "Mother and Mother", poking the hearts of countless parents.
are also children who come home from school. Wang Xiaofei treats her daughter with an amiable face:
"Baby is back, do you miss dad, come and let dad hug you." Attitude, facing the son's soft "dad (bǎbá)", instead of melting the old father's heart, he was severely reprimanded:
, "Speak to me, that's Dad!"
is responsive to his daughter, and strict to his son.
Wang Xiaofei's "daughter slave" operation caused a lot of netizens to laugh.
In fact, is it really good to treat children differently like this?
has a debate in "Wonderful Talk": Does need the child's consent to give birth to a second child?
Many parents don't think it is necessary. After Erbao is born, Dabao can naturally accept it, but is this really the case?
Let’s imagine first: as a child, his world is his parents, and his parents are the only ones for him; but if his parents give birth to two treasures without saying a word, all the love that originally belongs to him will be A large part is transferred to another child .
Faced with an "uninvited guest" who robs his parents of love, will the child feel better?
As Fu Seoul said: "When a child has a hundred candies in his hand, how can he mind sharing, when he only has two candies, how can you teach him generous?"
Therefore, before giving birth to the second child, parents need to guide their children to accept the arrival of the younger brother or sister; after
gives birth to the second child, they also need to try their best to coordinate the relationship between the two children.
can see Dabao's needs, instead of blindly using materials to make up for the second child of
. After giving birth to a second child, my friend finds that Dabao always loses his temper inexplicably, and likes to spoof all kinds of things that makes the couple feel uneasy. After reflection on
, my friend also realized that after he had Little Treasure, he went around Xiaobao 24 hours a day, and inadvertently ignored Dabao's feelings and felt ashamed of Dabao.
So, in order to make up for Dabao, friends will always buy a lot of toys and snacks that Dabao likes. I thought that Dabao would be more sensible in this way, but I didn't expect Dabao to become more vigorous and like to work against his friends more and more.
Children are more sensitive than we thought. Because of the birth of Xiaobao, the family's focus suddenly shifted from Dabao to Xiaobao. At this time, Dabao's psychology will form a strong sense of gap.
In fact, children's spoof is just to attract the attention of parents. I hope that parents can see their needs and give them enough love instead of blindly making up for it.
The love of parents is the key to comforting children's hearts. tells children that even with Xiaobao, parents will love you unconditionally.
gives Dabao more power, establishes the status of the boss, and makes Dabao more involved.
Sun Li once said in the program that since the second child, will be more concerned about the boss’s psychology. When
was pregnant with his sister, he began to consciously infiltrate the boss: he wants to have a younger sister or younger brother. After
waited for Xiaohua to be born, the name came from the boss.
gives more love, encourages and so on to take care of her younger sister, slowly cultivates his brother's sense of responsibility and accomplishment through precepts and deeds.
Similarly, Caier Ying recently revealed in "New Diary" that she would not show too much care in front of the bossThe second child, , said calmly to his son: "This is a gift from my mother."
The little sweet pepper jasper happily bloomed after hearing it, and accepted his brother's arrival as if he had his own pet. , I love my younger brother~
Appropriately give Dabao more power, which can not only give Dabao more caring , but also let Dabao participate in taking care of Xiaobao personally, enhance ’s sense of identity with Xiaobao , and promote children The relationship between them.
No matter Dabao or Erbao, it is an irreplaceable existence in parents' lives. If the balance of love is out of balance, it will cause harm to either party.
Don’t forget, when you’re busy with Xiaobao, the child behind you may be shouting silently in the corner: "Mom, I want to..."
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