"Human Poisoning" describes a forbidden love. The male protagonist Song Seung-hyun in the film falls in love with a married woman who is still the wife of his subordinates. In the end, he died for this love.
And another Kong Lingkan, who fell in love with a married woman, is embracing a beauty and gains both fame and fortune. As a rich N generation during the Republic of China, he offended Chiang Kai-shek for a woman who was a teenager older than him to fight against his family, and had to go overseas to avoid the limelight.
is also in love with someone you shouldn't love. Why is the ending so different? In fact, the fundamental reason for is that they have different ways of love because of their own sense of existence.
1. Relying on saving others to redeem oneself cannot hide the lack of existence in the original marriage
Song Seung-hyun's Kim Jin-pyeong is handsome and handsome, has a wealthy wife and a political background that others can’t match. In the play, Kim Jin-pyeong Making mistakes and not falling but rising, also confirmed the strong position of the wife's family. A life like
should be all satisfying, but why would he fall in love with a married woman?
Because the stronger his wife, the less he exists in the original marriage .
Jin Zhenping’s wife is almost perfect, beautiful in appearance, silently supporting his family, arranging everything he needs in life, but all of this is guided by her ambitions, she hopes her husband will be there Become his father's successor under his own guidance. Maybe it would be nice if she didn't have such a father.
Compared with his wife's ambition, Song Chengxian is almost hopeless. His pain stems from his dream of not being able to support his wife's ambition, coupled with the trauma he suffered in the war, the tyrant rule from his father-in-law in the family, and his father-in-law's injustice to others during his official career in order to help him. , So many things run counter to his heart. The long-term distress that has nowhere to confide in makes him nurture an impulsive devil in his heart. Unfortunately, not too late, he met , the heroine of . He mistakenly thought that it was love, but in fact, he was just playing with it.
Jin Zhenping seems to be beautiful, but most of this scenery comes from his wife's home: if you don't get a divorce, any problem can be solved; if you want a divorce, the biggest problem is from your wife. The pressure given by his wife's family made Jin Zhenping's fragile nerves more fragile and more sensitive. So a considerate wife became synonymous with noisy annoyance, and the female protagonist who didn't talk too much turned into a good heart.
When he met her who appeared to be another of his own, he wanted to pity her very much. When he saw her being given by his husband to various men who might be helpful to the promotion, his "protective desire" was overwhelming. Maybe he didn’t even realize that in his subconscious, wanted to save her and save himself , escape the prison, bondage, and pressure of the original marriage, so her appearance became a breakthrough. Even if it’s not this woman, there will be other people.
Not so much that he fell in love with the heroine, it is better to say that he fell in love with the short-lived vain that trance can save himself.
He tried to take away the revealing hostess in front of his boss, to learn to waltz for her, and the two went out for a tryst. He even taught her to drive. The passionate impulse of the hero's love is scary. In the play, he wants to take her to elope. After being rejected by the heroine, the angry hero shoots himself (not dead). In the end, the hero chose to fight and die on the battlefield in Vietnam. He ruined his life under the guise of love. He kept talking about loving the hostess, but never thought about what she really wanted. This is not a kind of irony.
Song Chengxian and the heroine's love, is destined to end without disease . Even Song Chengxian himself did not think about it for a long time. But it has to be verified in the most tragic way.
Very often, when a patient is sick without knowing it, he always thinks he is helping others, but he doesn't know that the person is his medicine. It's just that the medicine has grown legs and won't hold. Once the medicine for growing legs one day is gone, the doctor who thinks he is the savior becomes a patient with no cure. His self-righteous salvation, But it was the mortar that buried him.
and Kong Lingkan's experience is much more legendary.
Kong Lingkan's father is the 75th grandson of Confucius, and his mother is Song Ailing, the eldest of the three sisters of the Song family. At that time, the Confucian family was almost the richest family in the Republic of China, and it was also the most powerful and top-ranked in . This kind of background gives Kong Lingkan a lot of confidence. His lace news continues. With this kind of background, Kong Lingkan has not disappointed everyone's expectations and has become a "playing second generation". He has a lot of life, but also has a beginning and an end. . Kong Lingkan, who has been among the thousands of flowers, has his own unique taste, that is, he likes older women. After playing in the flowers for a few years, he met a married woman who was nearly in the age of . After some friendship, he discovered This is actually the person I have been looking forward to most in my life.
Love at first sight depends on the value of the face, long-term relationships look at the temperament. If a top rich second generation like Kong Lingkan chooses a political marriage, it must be of the same age and right. It's just that this kind of marriage may lack what Kong Lingkan wants most, and that is: understanding. Kong Lingkan’s wife, Bai Lanhua, is a card friend of his mother Song Ailing. If she can be a card friend with Song Ailing, Bai Lanhua’s social skills are naturally very good, and her emotional intelligence is not as clever as a girl of Kong Lingkan’s age.
Faced with Kong Lingkan who is much younger than her, Bai Lanhua, who has rich experience and high emotional intelligence, can often help him make suggestions. When Kong Lingkan needs her most, she can appear in time to support him. If women want love, what men need more is this understanding. In order to keep this rich second generation in check, Bai Lanhua also made a decisive choice to divorce, and took out 120 carefully to deal with this belated love. There is hard work and there will be gains. Twenty-year-old Kong Lingkan met the 40-year-old but charming Bailanhua. Kong Lingkan was conquered by this woman physically and mentally.
When Kong Lingkan had to go abroad to avoid the limelight because of offending Chiang Kai-shek, she followed firmly. The shared joys and sorrows made the two more inseparable. Finally, in 1939, the two married in Manila. Kong Lingkan was 23 years old that year and Bai Lanhua was in her 40s. Kong Lingkan's family who received the news were naturally unhappy, but in the face of everything that had become a foregone conclusion, they had no choice but to accept it.
If Kong Lingkan made the same choice as Jin Zhenping before entering marriage, choosing a woman who was good for her future but she didn't like, then perhaps Jin Zhenping's ending would be his lesson. However, Kong Lingkan has not hesitated because of this questioned relationship. He firmly married Bai Lanhua. In addition to Bai Lanhua's superb EQ, Kong Lingkan also has his own understanding and recognition of a good marriage. he chose the one that suits him best, not the that suits his family and future.
The sense of existence will not exist just because a person looks "strong", nor will it stay away just because a person looks "dull".
No matter how good a person is, there will always be dissatisfaction with life, and how to change this dissatisfaction will lead to different endings.
Jin Zhenping was dissatisfied with his marriage, but he wanted to save another person and achieve spiritual liberation. He did not have the courage to really come out of the original marriage, nor the confidence to come out. Kong Lingkan is also dissatisfied with his life. His solution is to satisfy himself by changing the external structure, including marrying a woman he likes. Kong Lingkan dared not care about the worldly vision, not only relying on his family strength, but also the ability to survive and live well. There are many rich second generations
, but not many rich second generations who can live well with their own abilities. Kong Lingkan's family background allows him to sit back and enjoy his achievements and easily obtain wealth that many people cannot match in his life. However, can seize opportunities before they come, which is Kong Lingkan's ability . Kong Lingkan's image has always been domineering and complicated, but he is indeed a very capable person. Song Meiling's speech to the United States is fromIn his hands, as Chiang Kai-shek's private secretary of foreign affairs, he has given advice on many matters concerning the diplomacy of various countries. During the War of Resistance Against Japan, he saw the right time and used the forces of Confucius and Song Dynasty to move around the United States in a series of activities to fight for the distribution rights of major American companies in China, paving the way for American businessmen who replaced Japan in China after the victory of the War of Resistance. The road also laid the foundation for making a fortune in the future. It can be said that even after leaving Chiang Kai-shek, he had already earned himself a life without worry.
2. There is no sense of existence in the original marriage, how to choose a new love
It is difficult to evaluate the satisfaction of marriage, but the divorce rate seems to tell everything.
According to the latest set of big divorce data released by the Civil Affairs Bureau, the number of registered divorces nationwide in the first three quarters of 2019 reached 3.104 million, which is 205,000 more than the same period last year. Since 2003, the divorce rate in my country has been rising for 15 consecutive years, and the number of divorces in my country reached a new high in 2019.
Many people have problems in their marriages. In order to solve these problems, more people choose to divorce.
and the seven-year itch have become the five-year itch or even the three-year itch. The men and women who once fell in love are increasingly unable to find their own sense of existence in marriage, which has led to a series of life tragedies and comedies. Some women have been upgraded to fight monsters and become strong women, but unexpectedly they make their husbands feel that they are too strong and lose their sense of presence in marriage; some women have become full-time mothers, but because of long-term disconnection from society and career development Husbands getting better and better communicate less and less, and then they can't find themselves in the married life and lose their sense of existence. More and more people ridicule their husbands after marriage.
loved to die, now I feel like a transparent person in front of each other. There are even many people who have chosen "cooperative marriage": they received a divorce certificate but did not live apart, raise children together, and sometimes sleep together, but do not interfere with each other in finding new people.
marriage is always There is nothing wrong with pursuing new love in one place, but what kind of new love you are looking for may make you make mistakes.
1) The sense of existence you can’t find in marriage, you can’t find
in an extramarital relationship. Before setting out to find love, perhaps you should organize yourself first, at least not to have extramarital affairs.
Song Seung-hyun died for his love with the heroine, but no one sympathized, only the heroine cried sadly, and then the day still has to be taken. However, I continue to be held by my husband to attend various occasions in need. Her life is still unchanged.
We should not stand on the moral high ground to blame others, but it is better not to stand in the moral low position to be accused by others. Accusation.
2) To be "selfish", first consider his own needs
Kong Lingkan insisted on marrying Bai Lanhua, which was scolded very badly at the time. Many people said he was "selfish". However, I think this There is nothing wrong with being "selfish." Kong Lingkan first realized his own needs, and after meeting his own needs, he went to meet the needs of others. In this way, he and others can be satisfied, and no one needs to be wronged. Instead, a benign character is formed. The ecological cycle of him is also the secret to grow old together with Bai Lanhua.
first considers his own needs, and it is to face his own sense of existence. After finding his own sense of existence, he can find a sense of co-existence in marriage.
I love someone I don’t love now, is willing to cherish each other’s value or persevere?
A word from Hu Lancheng, a scumbag, although not applicable to men and women, is very applicableAt the time of the breakup: wish the years to be quiet and comfort in the world.
1. When parting, don’t have to be vigorous and make people look back.
2. After you are separated, you are wonderful, don’t look back and look at your presence
You have to know that all the things you do, how well you live, how beautiful you dress, and how successful your career are, are not In order to show the original TA, there is no need to brush presence in the TA's eyes. Alone you may be lonely or afraid, but as long as you believe in yourself, you can eventually become a wonderful you. This wonderful you is unique and does not need anyone’s certification or meet anyone’s expectations. .
looking for a sense of existence is originally a pursuit of life, but we can’t get it just by crying like we did when we were young, let alone build our sense of existence through others. Becoming a better self is actually more important than being the self in the eyes of others.
As a woman, the sense of presence is not brushed out, but only you can get it through the thorns and thorns. This sense of presence will make you shine.
Many people live in the opinions of others throughout their lives. They have not seen the mountains and rivers before they don’t believe that there is such a beautiful scenery in this world. Just like " onions, radishes and tomatoes don’t believe that there are pumpkins in the world, they think it’s a fantasy. Pumpkins don’t speak, but grow up silently. " Pumpkins will eventually grow up, letting onions, radishes and tomatoes all grow up. Be surprised. You don’t have to worry about how they look when you grow up. When you grow up, you will naturally be surprised.
Song Seung-hyun's Kim Jin-pyeong is of course handsome and uncontrollable, but if you can choose, maybe the heroine just wants to plant flowers and grass in her free time, and spend the rest of her life in a bland way without being forced to feel any guilt.
Conclusion: I hope you and I can find your own sense of existence, without others to confirm. Our love may be simple, strong, or unique, but it is the motivation that makes us better. Love does not need to be proved, nor does it need to be destroyed, never fight, and still have your place.
About the author: I am the brain of a little yellow man. Although there are many flavors of life in the book, there is meaning in life.