Raising a daughter is like planting a pot of rare and famous flowers
Want her to grow confidently, powerfully and independently, parents must pay attention to the following three aspects.
Author | Cola Mom
Some time ago, when she sent her daughter to a hobby class, she heard a mother reprimand her child from a distance:
"Look at yourself, you run around outside all day long, how could there be a girl Look!"
took a closer look, only to find that a little girl with short hair was standing at the door of the dance classroom. Although
had already changed into a dancing skirt, she was stubborn, clinging to the door tightly, refusing to enter.
It turns out that little girls like to play football.
But her mother felt that girls should be quiet and beautiful, and she insisted on letting her daughter learn dance.
Seeing her daughter being so uncooperative, the mother dragged her into the classroom angrily.
said, "Anyway, I won't let you play football again. If you don't obey me, don't call me mom", then turned around and left.
Watching the little girl lowered her head and sobbing, I couldn't help thinking of a TV series I was watching recently:
" Our Ten Years ". The first unit story in
, "Night Banquet in Tang Palace", is about a group of dancing girls. It was this episode of
that earned a high reputation for "Our Ten Years".
However, in my opinion, the reason why this story can move people is never the elegant and beautiful appearance of girls, but the very precious qualities in them, which are worthy of our parents raising girls.
So, the following three words from my heart, I want to say to all parents with daughters -
ask their daughters to be brave
not perfect
Yi Wenyan in the play is a girl who loves to dance, at the same time, she is also a girl in the theater The one who works the hardest.
Until one time, the theater invited a "genius girl" Shen Jiayi as an assistant.
Who knows, Xiaoyan, who has always refused to admit defeat, actually retreated.
even wanted to give up the opportunity to interview.
It turned out that Xiaoyan, who had no confidence in herself, was completely inferior after watching Shen Jiayi's dancing.
She said in frustration:
"Shen Jiayi is so good, how can I have a chance?"
"So my existence is just to prove how good she is, to let everyone see, no matter how hard I try, I will chase after her. I can't catch up with her."
When Xiaoyan reluctantly cheered up, after training with Shen Jiayi, she was shocked to discover:
Those movements that Shen Jiayi can easily do, no matter how hard she imitates and how hard she tries, they can Still can't do it.
"No matter how hard I work, I'm still just a chicken head. The distance between the chicken head and the crested head of
is farther than Zhengzhou and Beijing."
"Although not as explosive as her,You're more flexible; you can't beat her rhythm, but you're smoother.
There is not only one beauty, and there is not only one good standard. "
Inspired by the director, Xiaoyan gradually found another path:
She no longer blindly imitates others, but thinks about how to use her strengths and jump out of her own style.
is like this, step by step, no one cares. The substitute, jumped to the leading role, and then to the chief.
In fact, in life, many girls are the same as Xiaoyan in the early stage:
They are very good, but for various reasons, they have long buried a message about inferiority in their hearts.
In the second year of junior high school, Sanmao suffered from autism and began a long absence from school.
However, Sanmao's sister and two younger brothers went to school normally every day, and their grades were also good.
Therefore, every When Sanmao heard them discussing what happened at school at home, he would cover his ears and hide in his room.
But what made Sanmao even more tormented was that his father came home from work every day, standing by himself. The sigh in front of the door.
She also wanted to be like the other children in the family, but she couldn't.
Later, Sanmao became a well-known writer, but in a letter to her father, she wrote:
"My whole life The sadness is not that I have not earned the whole world, but that you appreciate me. "
You must know that a person's height in life is often supported by self-confidence.
As author Murakami Haruki said:
"Be confident! As long as you are confident, you have nothing to fear. "
Comparing, criticizing, belittling... these don't make our girls better.
On the contrary, looking at your daughter with admiration and letting her be brave enough to be herself is what is really good for her. .
Because true happiness is not the perfection in the eyes of others, but the best version of yourself.
The unconditional love and acceptance of parents
is the source of the daughter's inner strength
Some people say:
z Pain and grief, face your own inadequacies and move forward. "Wang Baoyuan in
is such a girl.
has neither the qualifications of Xiaoyan nor the talent of her roommate Lin Beibei. She is still a little fat, but she has a very strong heart.
Baoyuan She knows that her conditions are not as good as others, but as long as she has the opportunity, she will always be the one who will fight for it without hesitation.
In order to keep herself from being a hindrance to everyone, others eat and drink water, and others rest her for training.
However, even if she has invested in After 100% of her efforts, Baoyuan was replaced because she was not strong enough. When
first heard the news, Baoyuan was so sad that she was about to cry.
But soon, she adjusted her mentality again. , wipe away her tears and continue to set off.
Fortunately, hard work pays off.
This time, when the choreographer was determined to perform a different dance "Tang Palace Night Banquet", she suddenly thought of the hard-working and smart Baoyuan.
And Baoyuan, who ushered in the second rehearsal opportunity, also worked harder and harder than before.
finally fulfilled her grandmother's wish, on stage and on TV.
is no exception.
"Second Star" Li Yan is also such a girl with a strong heart.
Since birth, Li Yan has been labeled as "hare lips". In the process of her growth, she is always accompanied by scrutinizing eyes and countless criticisms.
But every time she appeared in front of everyone, she was so calm, free and easy, without any tweaking or concealment. When
walked the catwalk in Paris, she had a plain face and did not wear high heels, but her face was very calm;
When someone questioned Faye Wong did not love children, she boldly jumped out to rebut:
"What right do you have to say that my mother does not love children? Me, do you understand my mother?
Are you my mother's child?"
Others' bad comments and unprovoked malice can't hurt her in the slightest.
In fact, every child with a strong heart is "grandly" loved by his parents.
Faye Wong once said in an interview:
"I take her (Li Yan) as a normal child. I think she is beautiful, really beautiful, and there is no problem at all.
She also has a healthy mind."
Dad Li Yapeng even told his daughter from a young age that when she encounters other people's surprised eyes, she doesn't need to avoid them. It's enough to give them the sweetest smile.
In a letter to his daughter, he wrote:
"God gave you a scar and I will make it your honor."
Yeah.
Only when we know that we are unconditionally loved and accepted at all times, our children will not be hurt by swords from the outside world, and will not change direction because of one or two setbacks. On the way of
growing up, they can walk more confidently and firmly, and face the difficulties and challenges in life with a more optimistic attitude.
A beautiful daughter is an advantage
Living beautifully is the ability
In "Tang Palace Night Banquet", there is also a girl named Lin Beibei.
Not only is she beautiful, she's also gifted.
became the leading actor of the troupe with little effort, and has been trained as the chief actor.
Later, with her beautiful face and outstanding dancing, Beibei got a rich second-generation boyfriend.
has been with her boyfriend for a long time, and Beibei yearns for that kind of life once and for all.
dance, although it's something I like.
but low wages and hard work.
thought of this, Beibei came up with the idea of resigning and marrying her rich second-generation boyfriend.
Until one time, her boyfriend took Beibei to the wine party. During
, someone coaxed Beibei to dance on the stage. Although Beibei refused repeatedly, her boyfriend insisted on letting her "add fun" to her friends, and Beibei left in a huff.
At this time, she realized that her boyfriend only likes her young beauty, not really loves her. After
woke up, Beibei didn't mention her resignation.
She regained her former passion for dance, and with her talent and hard work, she became a successful dancer.The brightest star in the troupe.
Beauvoir once said:
"The misfortune of a woman is that she is not asked to push her way up and go her own way, but that she is told that just by sliding down, she can reach the paradise of bliss.
When she finds herself in a mirage When fooling, it's too late, her power has been exhausted in the failed adventure."
Some time ago, I watched a movie " Growth Education ".
The heroine Jenny is a 16-year-old high school student with an A+ in her homework and is also very good at the cello.
If nothing else, she should have stepped into Oxford University campus.
However, she accidentally met a man named David.
David, who made a lot of money, took Jenny to various high-end places to experience the life of the so-called "high class", and successfully captured Jenny's heart.
Even Jenny's parents were gradually moved by David's sugar-coated shells.
They forgot the original intention of sending their daughter to the highest school.
instead promoted her daughter's date with the "golden tortoise-in-law" again and again, and even encouraged Jenny to give up her studies to be with David.
But when Jenny dropped out of school and ran to David's arms, she found out:
David is not only married and having children, but also a complete liar, all his money is stolen money of unknown origin.
In the process of raising our daughters, we often hear such voices:
"It is better to marry well than to study well." The parents relax their demands on their daughters, and feel that girls only need to be beautiful and happy.
But in fact, as Liang Wendao said:
"A woman must have the ability to make herself a good life, and it is very important to have something that others can't take away." Being skilled and living a wonderful life is far more important than creating a beautiful face for her.
After all, only knowledge and ability are things that girls can rely on in their entire lives.
Raising a Daughter:
"You can see the connection between the childhood you gave her and the strength and quality she has today, you are proud and very satisfied.
When you leave, an excellent A woman will continue to live, and she will pass on everything you taught her to her children."
Every girl is a rare flower that needs to be nurtured by her parents.
From now on, appreciate her beauty more, encourage her to be brave to be herself; love and accept her unconditionally, let her grow a strong heart; force her to grow up, so that she can provide herself with a sense of security... ...
Like "Like" , may our girls become confident, strong and independent.
was treated gently by fate and lived out his life in the way he liked.
