"What really overwhelms marriage is never the last few unwashed dishes, those words that are wrong, but the unbearable trivialities accumulated over time. Each time is a trivial matter, but all the trivial matters accumulate and become corrupt. Marriage erodes feelings.”
This is a passage posted by Taiwanese actress He Yuwen on social networks after her eight-year marriage.
was originally a love story of an enviable female celebrity marrying a wealthy family, but now there is only one place left.
First, let's briefly introduce He Yuwen.
She made her debut as an idol singer in high school and has been following the route of "Jade Girl Singer".
was once rated as "the most potential newcomer" and is very popular.
Later, she stepped into the film and television industry, and acted as Ruyi in "Xin Liang Shan Bo and Zhu Yingtai".
has also performed works such as " Spicy Fresh Master " and "The Ultimate Three Kingdoms". Although they are supporting roles, they are still developing well by the standards of newcomers.
However, her peak period was only two short years, and she was involved in scandals by herself, destroying the image of the lady. The
play could not be performed. She turned to a variety show and started running announcements, but the audience did not buy her face at all, and was voted as the "Lord of the Cold".
The career is not going well, but the luck is endless.
She met Shao Tiancheng (ex-husband) through introduction. She is a real rich second-generation and a fan of He Yuwen.
In the eyes of Shao Tiancheng, He Yuwen is like a fairy. When he is passionate about love, he will shout in the street: "You are the most beautiful female star in the world, I love you!".
Sweet words + various luxury gifts touched He Yuwen's heart. The two got married after six months of dating.
life is very sweet after marriage.
He Yuwen often shows her affection on the Internet.
Soon, they gave birth to two daughters one after another, the happy life of a family of four envied others.
He Yuwen, who has married into a wealthy family, "has a big change in temperament", and put down the baggage of a female idol in the variety show, without any cover, and the variety effect is full!
She often talks about the "private affair" of the family on the show. She blew herself up that her husband is a very controlling person.
Once she patted a male host on the shoulder. After returning home, her husband grabbed her hand and said: You have to chop off your hands!
She said that her husband's various behaviors made her feel very persistent and love her.
When she said this, her tone was slightly enjoyable.
But after giving birth to two children, everything changed, and her husband began to hate her naked.
dislikes her body that hasn't recovered after childbirth, and will directly say things like "You are old".
She fell into postpartum depression for a time. Instead of comforting and caring about her, her husband made fun of her "postpartum neurosis."
Because of childbirth, she often wakes up three or four times at night.
Instead of feeling sorry for her, her husband thought she was noisy and affected her sleep.
Shao Tiancheng is as always a "control freak", but his goal has changed from a wife to a daughter. It doesn't matter how his wife is, the most important thing is to take good care of the children.
She asked He Yuwen to be a "good mother", doing housework and raising children at home all day.
Even if a nanny is hired at home, He Yuwen cannot leave the house for more than half an hour.
's fatherly love for his daughter is only verbal, and everything is left to the wife.
The child is 3 years old, and her husband is not allowed to send it to the kindergarten, saying that the kindergarten is not a "sterile" environment, and children will get sick.
The child is at home and can only be taken care of by the mother.
He Yuwen sent her daughter to kindergarten only if she said, but as long as the child is sick all the time, her husband will ask her to kneel down and admit her mistake!
Ami thinks this is an insult to personality, is it also a kind of domestic violence?
In the eyes of her husband and everyone in her husband’s family, He Yuwen is just a servant, a family traveling, the young master moves his mouth, and his wife runs and breaks his leg. The friends around
said that she was too humble in this marriage, but a large part of the root cause comes from her native family.
her parents were divorced when she was 12 years old, and her mother's requirements for her were very high since she was a child.
She was loved by everyone when she debuted at the age of 15, but in the eyes of her mother, she was nothing. She often said to her: You are ugly and you are bad.
Mother can't see her hard work and dedication. Sometimes she works until two or three in the morning, and when she sleeps the next day, she will be denounced by her mother: "Stay at home after noon is a lazy bug."
The lack of communication and exchange between them led to her lack of self-confidence all the time and formed a kind of pleasing personality.
, who did not get her husband's attention, she thought of many ways to get her husband's approval.
She enrolled in class admission classes only to improve her ability to handle housework; she participated in interior decoration classes to make the home environment more warm.
The long-term depressive life can kill a camel with only a straw.
In 17 years, He Yuwen's father died, and the next year her mother was critically ill. The second daughter was only 1 year old, and she had to breastfeed.
can be imagined, she was exhausted physically and mentally.
During that time, she often used to drink to worry about her. For a time, she wanted to participate in the &39;&39; alcohol abstinence class&39;&39;, and she even shed tears when she looked at the photos of her singles.
and her husband did not reach out to pull her hand, still focusing all energy on work and his daughter, which made He Yuwen feel "I am nothing at all"...
two people are moving away because of various frictions. One day, when her husband blurted out "I only respect you as the mother of the child, but I no longer love you" , He Yuwen finally realized that this relationship could not be maintained.
"What I need is a lover, a confidant, and what he wants is a wife and a mother".
At the beginning of last month, He Yuwen issued a divorce statement, because the child is still too young, so the divorce does not leave home, and the daughters do not know the fact that they have separated.
Now, the way two people treat each other as friends is less demanding and more respectful. To put it plainly,
is because the two people pursue different living conditions.
He Yuwen frankly said: The ex-husband is a 100-point dad, a qualified husband, but not the lover I want.
"Details beat love", I hope she can put down the past and embrace the new future as soon as possible.
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