1. Liu Ruoyu has been studying with him for 8 years, why did her son rebellious and her husband divorced?
Recently, the TV series "Take Dad to Study Abroad" starring Sun Honglei, Xin Zhilei, Liu Mintao and other actors, caused heated discussions among netizens because of the exaggeration of the plot and character. The theme of the
TV series is pretty good, reflecting a series of sad and happy family stories in the process of studying abroad with children in three groups of families with different personalities and types.
Liu Mintao plays the role of Liu Ruoyu, his mother, who is a full-time mother who has resolutely given up work for her son and went abroad to study for 8 years.
On the surface, this is an enviable family. Liu Ruoyu used to be a doctor with superb medical skills. Her husband is strong in business and financial strength. His son Chen Kaiwen has studied abroad since he was young.
However, this is the most tragic family in the play. In order to be able to accompany her son in a foreign country, Liu Ruoyu reluctantly gave up her proud career, left all her family and friends around her, and returned to a housewife who was washing and cooking.
At the beginning, Liu Ruoyu felt that this sacrifice was worthwhile.
Her goal in life is to allow her son to follow her planned life trajectory and live the life she wants her son to live. Therefore, she wants to stare at her son's growth, and can't relax even a minute.
However, what she eventually got was not her son’s hard work in school, nor her husband’s gratitude for giving, but her son’s rebellious departure and her husband’s divorce agreement.
is even more terrifying, because the two places are separated all the year round, in fact, her husband already has an illegitimate child. The moment when he learned all this, Liu Ruoyu broke down and wept bitterly. A woman who devotes all of her to the family, and the result is a broken marriage that can never be returned.
Eight years ago, this life choice she made finally became a bad debt that could never recover the cost.
2. Harmonious marriage relationship, from the cooperative mode that both sides agree with
entering into a marriage, has a slightly different meaning for men and women.
Men are generally the same as before marriage, still focusing on work, which is the backbone of a family. But in addition to work, women are also responsible for giving birth and taking care of children, bearing more weight on both the psychological and physical levels.
The father contributed sperm, but the child came from the mother's gestation. Therefore, as parents, there are ten months of maternal emotion between women and children link .
This kind of intimacy makes it easier for women to focus on their children than men, leading to emotional negligence towards their spouse. Such actions are often the fuse that makes a family relationship unbalanced.
In fact, a woman becoming a housewife or taking care of her children wholeheartedly is not the root cause of the inevitable problems in marriage. Every family has its own model of husband and wife cooperation. As long as the two parties can reach a balance, the marriage can go smoothly and long-term.
However, if a cooperative model that both parties agree with is not established, and one of them just passively accepts the other's arrangements, then sooner or later there will be problems in the marriage.
In a normal family, the correct order of emotional relationship should be that the relationship between husband and wife is greater than the relationship between parent and child, not the other way around. Parents are the first role models for children, and the shaping of children's personality and future feelings often carry the shadow of their parents' marriage.
Unfortunately, many married women do not realize the importance of this.
3. Women in marriage, don't make these two mistakes
Liu Ruoyu in the drama completely ignores these, her mistake is not not in not giving and caring for this family.
is on the contrary, she does too much and too devoted. Her problem is that she put the fulcrum of her feelings in the wrong place, causing her family to slide in an uncontrollable direction.
First of all, she chose to make the parent-child relationship greater than the husband and wife relationship. She regarded her son as more important than her husband, ignoring that her husband also has emotional needs and is a wife who is absent from the relationship. Before
went abroad, she was busy with work and probably cared little about her husband. After going abroad, when her husband needed encouragement and comfort, he still had no wife to accompany him, and ultimately did not resist the temptation to cheat outside.
, who is noble and powerful, never imagined that there would be such a possibility, nor was she aware of the crisis, and wishful thinking that her marriage was waiting for her in place, and would not leave or go bad. As a result, when her husband asked her for a divorce, she was hysterical and could not believe and accept it anyway.
Secondly, she believes that there should be rewards for her efforts. But her contribution was unilateral wishful thinking, not out of the intention of her husband and son.
She feels that she has made self-sacrifice for her family, and everyone should return value to her. She once said to her son Chen Kaiwen: Liu Ruoyu did not exist 8 years ago, and now only Chen Kaiwen's mother exists.
Xianglin’s wife usually repeats her efforts, which puts her son Chen Kaiwen under a lot of psychological pressure. He feels that he has no freedom to be controlled by a strong force. On the contrary, he is alienated and disgusted with his mother, making the relationship between mother and child go further and further.
4. The wisdom of a woman in marriage is not to give up the life tragedy of Liu Ruoyu
, which is never an exception in real life.
Many women give up jobs, careers, hobbies, and circle of friends for their families, but they may not get what they want in the end.
Taiwanese singer Rene Liu wrote a new book after 7 years of marriage, called "I Dare to Be Alone in Your Arms". In her book, she describes her growth and perception after marriage: "After getting married, I often skip the role of my wife to think about my life’s dreams and responsibilities, whether it revolves around the theme of self, I can still enjoy a person’s coffee and sky light ".
Liu Ruoying’s wisdom is the insight that in marriage, a woman can never be without personal ideals and can not give up self-growth.
Family is not all of us, it is only part of life, but we can have both. The way to make family relationships better is to make yourself better first.
Women who lost themselves in marriage, it is never too late to make changes. Pei Yin, the mother of the first Trinity in
TV series "Juvenile Pie," is also a wife betrayed by her husband. She also suffered fifteen years in a deteriorating marriage.
However, Pei Yin has a very clever approach when dealing with marital problems. That is, no matter how the other person hurts her, she chooses to live her own life first.
Compared with Liu Ruoyu's self-defeating, she has more female wisdom and does not destroy and indulge herself. If you can't grasp the marriage, let it go calmly, at least let yourself live the life you like.
inappropriate marriage, even if you struggle hard, you will catch up with the rest of your life. Turning and leaving to find better happiness, but the best choice.
Our life will be richer and more complete because we have family and children. But marriage will not automatically keep fresh, and you cannot stay in a state where you no longer grow up. Only when you grow up with your family, know how to let go and respect each other, learn to cherish and improve yourself, you can have a more exciting marriage.
The law of attraction tells us that when you know how to live for yourself, live upward, independent and confident, all good things will be attracted to you. Love is so, so is happiness.
The wisdom of a woman in marriage is not to give up herself easily.
Even if you are a housewife, you must keep your life value. The relationship between happiness and you is that only when you are in full bloom and breeze will come.
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