recently hit "Little Joy", a TV series with three families preparing for the college entrance examination. To be honest, I didn't plan to watch it, but almost everyone around was discussing the characters in the play, and everyone saw it. The points are different, some praise the cast and acting skills; some feel distressed about the parents in the drama, and they shed tears with them; empathize with them, and think of their time in the college entrance examination. It sounds so wonderful, I can't help but watch a few episodes. In one part of
, I was very impressed by the section where Lin Leier had just arrived in Beijing and had dinner with Fang Yifan's grandparents. When grandparents heard that Lei'er was going to spend her senior year with Yifan, she immediately expressed surprise and questioning. In fact, Tong Wenjie was dissatisfied with it. After that, what grandma Yifan said made Tong Wenjie full again. It was really embarrassing to the extreme. This bridge segment takes only a few minutes, but the whole segment has a strong sense of substitution, because it plays too much like a real mother-in-law.
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has always been the main force in the marriage relationship. Some time ago, I chatted with my university classmates in the WeChat group, and they all talked about parenting, but later I got involved with my mother-in-law, and it was a great chat. Later, a male student concluded, "I thought I was in the wrong group. I didn't expect that you have already started discussing these things. After reading your chat records, I felt deeply moved." A female classmate replied, "This is what your daughter-in-law and her friends also talked about." The male student agreed. Why is
like this? The mother-in-law is not a mother? Isn't the daughter-in-law a daughter? Some people say that this idea is too naive. I remember seeing a story before. It sounds funny, but it's a real story. A mother-in-law complained in the community, "My daughter-in-law is really too lazy. She wakes up every day, does not stack quilts, and does not cook." The neighbor asked again, what about your daughter? "My daughter was married very well, and she wakes up naturally every day when she sleeps. She doesn't have to clean up the house, and the food is ready when she wakes up," the mother-in-law said with great relief.
The harmony of a family is particularly important to deal with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, but even the harmonious relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will occasionally produce conflicts and opinions for some trivial matters. Especially after having a baby, differences in parenting concepts and lifestyles are the most concentrated areas of conflict. At this time, the test is actually to be a son’s IQ and EQ. In "Little Happy", Huang Lei played Fangyuan, which is a good model.
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is originally a new family relationship formed by the extension of the parent-child relationship and the relationship between husband and wife. In the mother-in-law relationship, plays the role of "intermediary". Personality characteristics are best understood. Therefore, the son plays a very important intermediary role in handling the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
◆ Identity 1: The peacemaker
is actually at home, and there is nothing right or wrong. There is no human touch at home, and without the silly confusion, there will be no happiness at home.
’s mother complained to Fang Yuan that Lin Leier’s arrival would affect Yifan’s preparations for the college entrance examination. Fang Yuan directly stated that Tong Wenjie had discussed with him. After returning home at night, he knew that his daughter-in-law was going to ask questions, so he took it all on him. , Confess your mistakes to your wife. It not only comforted Tong Wenjie's bad mood, but also explained it for his parents.
On trivial matters, if anyone complains to oneself, they must continue. Don’t be patient. Isn’t family life made up of trivial matters? But there are no small things at home. The usual basic work is done well, and no matter how big things are, they can be resolved slowly with a good mass foundation.
◆ Identity 2: Psychological Counselor
When a conflict arises, the son needs to give full play to his own advantages and do a good job of psychological comfort for both parties. Through communication with the son, the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can more easily remove the psychological barriers and enhance the relationship. . According to a survey of
, 52% of married people who have been married for 2-5 years said that the problem of worrying about the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has always existed. % Of people said that the most common reason for conflicts is due to housework or because of the language and tone of both sides speaking .
◆ Adjust your mentality as soon as possible to maintain family harmony.
When a new family is established, both mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will have expectations of each other, but there is always a gap between ideals and reality. The more expectations, the greater the disappointment. When getting along with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, you should allow each other to dislike yourself, and allow each other to have different ideas and ways of handling things . In addition, good and timely communication is also very necessary. A colleague’s sister from the previous unit of
has always been in a harmonious relationship with her mother-in-law after marriage. Everyone is curious about how she did it. She said that although her mother-in-law is not a mother, she should treat her mother-in-law like a mother in the heart. Every time they go on a trip, they will bring both parents with them. They will never favor one another. should be more considerate and understanding of the elderly. Don't think about letting the elderly change for you, and let your expectations be zero. There will be disappointment . She said that she did not want her husband to be too embarrassed. It's all a family, and spending a little money is a trivial matter, and the family is in harmony.
Mother comes to talk in the early morning:
As the time spent with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law increases, the degree of mutual acceptance will gradually increase. Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law originally lived in different families, and each had its own life background and habits. , And mother-in-law and daughter-in-law live together, which requires a gradual process of understanding and adapting to each other. In this process, we need to empathize. Even as a family, you must learn to adapt. Adaptation is the greatest wisdom and ability in a family.
A second-born mother who started to create in the early morning, I wrote my heart, every bit is my parenting experience with the two children. I hope my parenting experience can give you a little help!
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